Can I really love the Alpha?

Can I really Do without him?

For the next week was tough. I was alone and all I could think about was Derek and how much I love him. 'Alyssa, get it through your head he never loved you. He never even liked you. You are just a stupid teenager.' I tell myself as I feel the tears coming down my face I hear footsteps I wipe the tears off my face.
Scott swings the door open. "Hey Lyss how are you feeling?"
"I am fine, I guess I am going to go to school on Monday. I need to get out of the house."
"Okay great." he said with a smile. It was a Friday night and everyone already had plans I don't know what to do.
" Wait Scott are you hanging out with Allison tonight?" I asking hoping he said no which he did. I decided to take mom's care and drive to Allison's house. She was the only one I felt comfortable talking about my feelings with right now.
Chris answered the door. "Hey Alyssa Allison is upstairs. Also, when do you want to start training?"
"Can we start Monday after school?"
"Yea that sounds great." he said in an excited tone.
I ran up the stairs to Allison's room. "Hey allison."
"Hey Alyssa are you okay?"
"Not really I am depressed from being home and the Derek thing. Mostly the Derek thing. He was my first real boyfr..." I stop myself he wasn't even my boyfriend,"you wanna know what I am being an ass we never really dated. He never took me on a real date." I thought getting angry. "He just wanted to use me to get to talk to Scott. Damnit I am so stupid."
"No your not you are just a teenager." Allison and I both laugh. That was really clever.
"I am done feeling sorry for myself I am gonna get my shit together and live my life."
"Good so when are you coming back to school?"
"Monday."
Excitedly she said we have to find you a kick ass outfit.

Derek's POV
I miss Alyssa. More then anyone really knows. I crave the feeling of her lips on mine. I just want to be with her but I know I can't. I have to do it's best for her.
Everyone I have feelings about always ends up dying and I like Alyssa too much to watch that happen to her. I may even love her. 'Stop saying that. You don't love her. You need to do what is best for her.' I keep telling myself.
Right now I am trying to focus on who to bring into my pack I have been looking at some students at Beacon Hills. I am interested in taking in two students named Erica and Issac.
It is so hard to focus on being an alpha when I cannot be with the girl I love.
I just have to try to forget and move on.

Alyssa's POV
For the whole weekend I was catching up on stupid homework. I want to cry there was so much. I went to bed on Sunday night and before I knew it my alarm was going off.
I took a shower and got dressed. I put on my tight red crop top with long sleeves, my black leather skirt, and last but not least my ankle boots. Next came hair and make up. I curled my hair lightly and but on red lipstick with clear gloss over it with my base makeup and mascara
"STILES IS HERE COME ON WE ARE GONNA BE LATE." Scott screamed from down the hall. I grabbed my backpack and ran down the stairs.
Scott is already in the jeep waiting. When I run in the car they both looked at me wide eyed.
"What is wrong with you guys?"
"Alyssa go change!" Scott says angrily. "Why what's wrong with this outfit?" I am so confused on what was wrong with it.
" It is too sexy. You are my sister I am not okay with this."
" Well I think she looks good." Stiles says then Scott smacks him in the back of the head.
" Well to bad I am wearing it." I say with a smirk on my face.
Stiles drove to school. They just caught me up on all the normal school drama. Before I walked in I saw Allison and Lydia talking I run towards them and hug them.
" I love your outfit. Sleek and sexy. Maybe my fashion sense has rubbed off on you." Lydia says with excitement. It was Lydia's first day since Stiles and the Sheriff had found her.
" The only good thing about being missing for awhile was that I lost nine pounds."
When we walk into the school everyone is starring at Lydia and I since I haven't been in school for two weeks.
While grabbing my books I see Erica. " Hey Erica." I scream while running after. Erica was an epileptic. Everyday she wore sweatpants and a sweat shirt. I feel bad for her she is such a good person.
"Hey Alyssa. How are you feeling you weren't in school for two weeks?" She said with concern.
" I am okay it is great to see you. I got to go I am going to be late for English."
"Okay I will see you later."
All my classes were really boring except for chemistry. I got stuck with Jackson for a project.
All of a sudden I saw it I saw the alpha. I started panicking I couldn't breath.
"McCall are you okay? MCCALL! Mr. Harris I need help."
Before I knew it I was on the floor. I don't know what is happening. I see Scott and Stiles running over to me.
"ALYSSA ALYSSA." That is the last thing I heard before I blacked out.