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July 7, 2020
God, could You please appear in my dreams and tell these words to me?
"My child, I know everything. I deeply understand. I will answer. I will provide. I am working. And I will bless you."
Because if You do, my anxious heart will spontaneously feel calm.
There are a lot of HOW's and WHY's in my mind right now. I feel so unsure. I am uncertain. I can't figure it all out. I'm worried about the future and the consequences of what I did. I don't know when it'll be alright. I don't know if it's the right time to completely let go of someone whom I sincerely love.
Is it already the season to do so? I want to, but I can't. And even though my hands are aching for holding on, I can't let go.. yet. Not this early, God.
Forgive me for not knowing what to do a lot of times, for choosing to overthink instead of praying, and for making a lot of poor decisions and mistakes in my life.
The wounds of my heart are still fresh. And I'm needing Your reassuring voice to tell me that, "You should keep going and walk towards Me, by then, you will be alright."
Please teach me to move forward as I leave the past behind, without knowing everything other than the truth that You will forever carry me in Your bosom. Teach me to trust in You, without thinking about my situation over and over again, because You have already figured it out.
Remind me that I shouldn't be looking at these things from my own perspectives. Remove my desire to work them out the way I want to. And God, please help me to embrace Your will and not my own will, for Your plans are far better than mine.
When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer. (Psalms 94:19)
You are my only clarity in this blurry and messy world.
So to all my confusions and uncertainties, I'm finally choosing to let go of all the fears you brought into my life. Nonetheless, thank you for revealing how weak and dependent I am to my God, for His power works best in my weaknesses.
˖°. 📖 .°˖
2 CORINTHIANS 12:8-9 Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.
