The Difference

Chapter 4

I wake up the next morning and hear Ava in the kitchen. I approach her and she asks me how I'm feeling.

"I mean, am I completely out of line for being mad at him for kissing me, then saying he needs more time to figure out how he feels?" I ask, holding the coffee Ava made me in my favorite mug.

"Absolutely not!" She says from behind the kitchen counter. She turns to face me at the stool across from her and shakes her head. "Who does he think he is? He acts as if you should just wait for him! I mean, really? Like you don't have anything better to do?" She says, getting angrier as she speaks.

"As far as I'm concerned, I'm going to be out of this area in nearly a year. Then I'll never see him again," I say, sadly.

Ava picks up on my tone and takes a seat next to me. "Do you want me to call the store and tell Austin you're sick?" She questions.

"Only if you call your boss and tell her you're not coming in either," I say, smiling. "Oh wait, you're your own boss!", I add, nudging her.

"Alright... girls' day! I'm going to get us some lunch and in the meantime, you have to come up with a list of movies we're going to watch. I suggest we start off with Dirty Dancing," Ava says, running into her room and grabbing her purse. "What do you want for lunch?"

"Oooh.. can we get pizza?"

She laughs. "Sure, I have to run some errands but I'll pick it up. And I'll call Austin when I get in the car, okay?"

"Sounds good," I say, bringing my coffee mug over to the couch and turning on the TV. I start to search through the options and come up with some movies to watch today. After a few minutes, I end up falling asleep while waiting for Ava to return.

"Rosemary!" She yells, startling me awake. 

"You've gotta stop waking me up," I say, pulling myself up to a seat. I let out a yawn and Ava sits next to me, setting down a box of pizza.

"I have to tell you something," She says, nervously.

"What's up?"

"Well, I called the store to tell Austin that you woke up sick, but Eric answered. I asked to speak to Austin and he asked who was calling so I told him it was me and he wouldn't stop asking me about you. He wanted to know if you were actually sick, so obviously I said yes so he wouldn't be suspicious," She tells me.

"Well, that's good at least. What he doesn't know won't hurt him, right?" I ask, grabbing a piece of pizza.

"Rosemary, what I'm trying to say is, I don't think he's going to give up any time soon. I know you're mad at him, but maybe you guys can still work towards being friends," she adds, hopefully.

"I don't even know how to be his friend at this point! He said we were just friends and then he admitted he's thought about us being together, but we can't do anything about it. Why would I want to make up the next day? I'm still so mad at him. It's like he gave me exactly what I've wanted and then took away my fairytale 3 seconds later!"

Ava rolls her eyes at my reference to fairytales, but says, "I understand," She adds, after a deep breath, "But I know you, you can't stay mad at him forever. Especially not at those pretty blue eyes," she teases.

"Ugh. The only man I want in my life right now is Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing," I say, taking another bite of my pizza.

"Wish granted," Ava says, plopping down next to me and taking a slice of pizza in the process. We finish watching our favorite movie and begin to clean up. By this point, it's around 2:00 p.m. Ava's phone rings as she makes her way to the kitchen.

"I'll clean, A, you get your phone," I say, patting her on the back.

"Thanks," she says hurrying out of the room. I hear her greet one of her clients on the phone as they begin to discuss details about an event she would be planning. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. Without realizing I'm in sweatpants two sizes too big, an old cropped hoodie, Christmas-themed fuzzy socks, and I haven't washed my hair in days, I open the door. Eric stands in front of the door with a bag in his hand.

"Hey. Oh man, Ava wasn't kidding, you really look sick," He says as if nothing has changed between us. 

I roll my eyes and begin to close the door, but he stops me. 

"Rosemary! I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. Can I come in? I brought you some stuff," he says, looking at me with sympathetic eyes. 

"Fine, but only for a second because I'm sick, you know," I say, mockingly. 

"Great!" He walks past me and to the kitchen counter and puts the bag down. "So, I brought you some soup, and juice boxes, and my mom sent some cookies for you. She said she remembered how much you loved her vegan chocolate chip cookies she made for your birthday last year," he says, laying all the stuff out in front of me.

"Wow, thanks," I say politely. "This was really nice, Eric."

"No worries. But you'll never believe what happened at work today! So, Austin was helping a customer and the customer just completely flipped out on him for no reason, it was-"

"Eric."

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing here? Did you come to apologize, or-"

"Apologize for what?" He questions.

I give him a frustrated glare.

"I just wanted to talk the way we used to," he says. 

"Eric, how can we talk the way we used to when I don't even know what's going on inside your head?"

"I just need time to figure out what I want. I mean, I went on a date with Hannah and it went really well, and I don't know where my head is at because I still see Becky in everything I do," he says, frustrated. 

"That's why I told you to take time to find yourself, but you decided to involve other people! Worst of all, you just act like you and Becky never happened.  You can erase the proof, sure. But never the feelings." I say, staring at him, blankly. He looks down as if it's all just hitting him. We both look up as Ava walks down the stairs, interrupting us. 

"Oh God," she says, looking back and forth between Eric and me.

"Hey Ava," he says politely. "I just brought some stuff over since Rosemary is sick." 

"Right," Ava says as if she forgot about their prior conversation. "I just got a really big potential client for an event and I need to meet with the family in about an hour, so we'll have to reschedule our "sick day," she says, walking around Eric and grabbing her work binder.

"I'll come with you!" I say, walking towards her.

"If you want to, it's not really a formal meet-up-"

"Perfect," I cut her off, dashing to my door finding any excuse to get out of the situation before I end up crying again. I shut the door behind me and leaned my back against it, sliding to the floor. I curled my knees into my chest and rested my head in my hands. I could hear Ava and Eric's talking get quieter as she walked him to the door. 

"I really messed up. Not even our relationship, or whatever it was, but our friendship, too," Eric says to Ava. 

"I just need to be real with you. You coming around acting all nonchalant is just going to make her even madder. Don't come back and find her until you're sure that you're ready. Yeah, she's a handful and she gets a little crazy sometimes, but that's how she shows that she cares. She's never yelled at a guy before you. They just weren't worth fighting for," Ava says, and I can picture Eric's polite smile as I hear the front door close and moments later, his car starting.

I hear Ava's footsteps coming toward my room so I shuffle up to my feet and pretend as if I'm finding something to wear. She opens the door and takes a glance at me. 

"Put on something cute. You never know who could be falling in love with you," she says, with a wink as she leaves my room. 

I playfully yell after her, "Just for the record, I think you're crazy, too! And a handful!"