The Difference

Chapter 14

"First off, I want to thank you for meeting me. I know you've been avoiding me and what I did was so awful, Rosemary. I don't expect you to forgive me," he says, as a waitress comes over to ask what we would like. We order and he waits for me to respond to him.

"Right. I didn't come here to talk about that. Your voicemail just really worried me, honestly. I know things aren't the same anymore, but I'm still here for you." I say, reaching out and squeezing his arm.

"Thanks, Rosey. Well, where do I start?" He takes a sip of the coffee as soon as the waitress sets it down and takes a deep breath.

Eric begins to tell me how his whole life has been turned upside down a few months ago. When Becky dumped him, he didn't just act like it didn't happen, the way I accused him of handling it. The truth is, he had a lot more going on and he had to prioritize the pain.

"So, Becky dumps me. Then, my dad loses his car dealership to my grandpa, who essentially prioritized money over his family and screwed us all over. My grandpa called me this morning with a guilty conscience, and said he was surprised I even picked up the phone. He said he'd sign the dealership over to me today if I could convince my dad to forgive him," he says, sighing.

"Your dad is still mad at me for the time I jokingly yelled, "Roll Tide," during the Alabama/Clemson game," I comment.

"I know. He's impossible," Eric adds.

"We all know your dad is famous for holding grudges, but this is an amazing career move for you! And obviously you would let your dad work with you, too, right?" I ask.

"Of course. He taught me everything I know. But I even mentioned it to him, theoretically, to see how he would handle it, and he got so angry with me. That's when I called you and left that voicemail. I didn't know who else I could turn to."

"I really don't know what to say. I mean, what am I supposed to do?"

He looks at me like I'm stupid. "Yeah, he still holds a little bit of silly anger toward you about that comment, but he really respects you, Rosemary, and you know it. I bet if you were with me when I try to talk to him about it, he would-"

"Seriously?" I cut him off. "You called me here to convince me to help you resolve all your issues so you can go back to living your perfect life?"

He can't tell if I'm being serious, and neither can I. "He would at least listen if you were with me! He has always respected your opinion. Just tell him you're on my side!" He doesn't deny my accusation and I nod knowing I was right.

"You can't avoid conflict, forever. You know this, right?" I ask coldly.

"You're one to talk," he shoots back.

"Okay, I didn't lie to my somewhat boyfriend about being here just for you to yell at me, so-" I jump up from the table, and Eric stops me.

"Please. Seriously. I don't know what else I can say to make it up to you," he pleads. I sit back down. "The thing is, Rosey, we are just so close. I've never told anyone as much as I tell you. I rely on you so much and the thought of us dating crossed my times more than you could know. But I was so afraid," he says, tearing up.

"Afraid of what?" I ask.

"Of messing it up! Of losing you! Of not being good enough for you! And then, you started to get distant and I could tell I was hurting you. You stopped making me talk about things that were bothering me and I knew it was because you were giving up on me. And you had every right to, I mean, it was so obvious you liked me and I acted like I didn't see it because I knew for a fact you were too good for me," he confesses. "And that, is the difference between a boy and a man. The difference between Troy and I. He's not afraid of losing you, but I am. So much." He reaches for my hand and I let him hold it for a minute.

"Fine. But I can't talk to your dad today, I'm too busy with my new job. As a matter of fact, I need to get back before they all wonder where I am. I'll call you," I say, throwing my coat on and grabbing my coffee.

"By the way, nice shoes," Eric comments on my shoes he used to hate.

I let out a small smile and give him a wave goodbye. I feel instant relief as I head back to the mansion. I get so anxious when I'm with Eric and that entire conversation didn't help at all. I feel sort of guilty for not acknowledging what he was saying but at the same time, I didn't want to stay too long. Especially since part of me will always care for him.

My thoughts of Eric are washed away as I enter the ballroom and see Troy. He instantly lights up when he sees me and I know I need to tell him the truth.

"Hello, gorgeous," he says, and I let out a laugh noticing how similar him and Brad actually are.

"Hello handsome," I say back, giving him a tight hug. He leads me away from all of the workers who seem to be cleaning the floor for the third time this morning.

"What's wrong?" He asks me.

"I think we need to talk," I say.

"Oh boy. I don't like the sound of that," he says nervously.

"It's not you, it's something I did. And you have  every right to be mad," I say to him. He is silent, waiting for me to finish. I lead him outside of the ballroom to the hallway by the magnificent portrait of Mrs. Marigold. We sit down on a luxurious bench in the hall.

"The thing is," I start, taking his hand. "When I made that phone call before, it was Eric on the phone," I admit.

"I know," he confesses.

"You know?"

"Yeah, I heard you say his name. I could tell it was a private conversation so I didn't want to intrude. I walked away and when I came back to find you, you were just standing there and you seemed so sad, so I didn't want to pry. But I get it, I mean, you've been friends for so long. I can't get mad at you for being a good friend," he says.

"I appreciate that, but-"

"I mean, as long as you don't hang out with the guy. I don't really trust him all that much," Troy adds. Is he jealous? I get a little angry, but take a deep breath to calm down.

"Well-" I start.

"Well what?"

"He actually, uh- I went to meet him for coffee just now. He is dealing with some family issues," I add, trying to intercept his anger.

"What the hell, Rosemary?" Troy says and I can see he is upset with me.

"I know, I know. I should've told you, but it all happened so fast, and he needs my help with convincing his dad to forgive his grandpa and-"

"What does that have to do with you?"

"I get that you're mad, but just a few seconds ago you were fine with us being friends. Why'd you say something you didn't mean?"

"I hate being lied to, Rosemary!" He changes the subject.

"Then don't freak out when I try to be honest with you!" I yell back.

"I really thought you were different," he says, getting up. "But you're just another stupid girl hung up on some guy who doesn't give a shit about you," the words sting instantly and I feel myself start to cry.

I hate the way I cry whenever I'm overwhelmed with emotions. I see Mrs. Marigold approach Troy as he enters the ballroom. She looks around as if searching for me, and I'm thankful the door man closes it before she sees me sitting here, alone. I grab my phone, telling Ava I decided to work at home for the rest of the day, claiming it would be easier to use my laptop than a notepad. I remember I left my notepad in Troy's room anyways, and there's no way in hell I'm going up and getting it after the things he said to me. Just when I thought he was different, too. I walk out of the mansion and instead of going home, I go back to Eric and I's spot at the  coffee shop. I've always found comfort in our old booth.

I ponder what he said about the difference between Troy and him, the difference between a man and a boy. Eric was right, I conclude. Troy isn't afraid of losing me. I made one mistake and I'm just another "stupid girl." I stop crying because I don't feel anything anymore. Just emptiness. I head home and start over on the flower arrangements. I call local florists and compare prices. I coordinate the color scheme with all of them and try to find the best option before Ava comes home.