Percy Jackson OC Critiques [PAUSED]

26 - BlueTheSilent

Full name : Maude Eberhardt (Her mother is 50% German) Maude is an old German name and it means powerful battler 

And Eberhardt means "brave boar", roughly!

So I'm going to assume you mean she's 25% German? You say later in her backstory that she's 50%, but you also say she needs to learn German to communicate with her grandparents, so I'm going to assume she's second generation.

Nicknames: Mud (She hates it and people are using it to provoke her)

In a friendly teasing way or a bullying way?

 Height/Weight: 5'3 / 123Ib. 

 Description of appearance: Her black wavy hair ends somewhere in middle of her back. Her eyes are the colour of dark chocolate. She has a simple Ashley piercing.

In case you, like me, classify piercings by position and not name, an Ashley piercing is the one in the middle of your bottom lip.

Her skin is lighter than it should be, so it's not so hard spotting Maude with burned skin in summer.

As in she's white generally, she's especially pale-skinned, or she has some kind of actual skin condition that makes her sunburn easier? It's kind of unclear what "should be" means here. Is it something she's insecure about?

She has a long scar on her back, she got it when she met a hellhound for the first time and tried to protect her best friend. Her body build is a bit muscular, thanks to her training. 

Just a bit? Does that mean that she doesn't put on muscle easily, or that the specific way she trains means that she stays poorly defined for whatever reason?

Birthday: April 7th, 1995 

 Godly Parent: Ares 

 Power from godly parent: Telumkinesis,  Maude is skilled with almost every weapon, the exceptions are bow and arrow and daggers. 

...How small is a sword before it becomes a dagger to her? Are bows difficult because she's not good at aiming-- in which case, are all ranged weapons difficult? Does that mean daggers is referring to throwing knives, or is there another separate reason why swords that get too small are hard to use?

Also she is good at cursing swords, so if Maude isn't tired or badly injured, she messes with other campers for fun, or she uses it as a revenge. But after she curses the weapon she needs to rest for awhile, it takes a lot power so she could faint if she wouldn't. Cursing swords in fight is harder because she can't focus. 

Hey! Quick question: what does cursing a weapon mean for Maude? What does a cursed weapon do differently from a normal weapon, how does the cursing of a weapon work, and how long does the curse last after she casts it? Are all her weapons cursed so they do extra poison damage, or do curses render the weapons unusable? Cursed Weapons are definitely a thing in PJO, and it's an ability Ares has, but it's still good to know Maude specifically's skillset when it comes to cursing weapons.

 Age at beginning of book: 15 

 Personality: She is a chill person, she doesn't care what's going on around her and just minds her own business. 

VERY spicy for a child of Ares! Generally, having a character go against a stereotype is always interesting because it lets you generate free conflict by having to contend with the fact that other people will view her based on that stereotype and take note of the fact that it doesn't apply to her. 

But making her angry is a easy task, just say something she doesn't like or do something to annoy her and good luck surviving.

This is a contradictory trait! Unless her rage switch is very hard to trigger, you can't be both chill and have a murderous hair-trigger temper. You need to either hammer out very specific conditions under which either of her moods activates, or you need to pick one, because the alternative is a character that just sort of does whatever the plot needs her to do and has no integrity.