Maybe One Day

16: Saying Goodbye

*So a lot happens in this chapter, mainly based around Isaac...yes yes I know, Isaac has been missed, at least by me :) Happy readings!*

I had been meeting with Mae, Riley and Parker for about two weeks now. We didn't really hang out much but they continually sold me different kinds of drugs that helped take the pain away. At first it was just once, here and there, that I smoked. But I always felt so much better after it, eventually it became habit.

I could feel myself becoming more and more distant with people. My parents didn't suspect anything, like I assumed, so in the end, the only people I was worried about hurting were Noah and Kendall.

One day, after one of the rare days that I bothered going to school, Noah came up to me and asked why I was sad all the time.

"I don't know, bud, I'm just tired I guess," I answered him sadly. Kendall gave me a questioning look from off to the side but didn't say anything. It killed me to lie to these guys, but what kind of role model would I be if I told them I was consistently doing drugs?

"Okay," he responded solemnly and shuffled away. I felt a pang of guilt for doing this to him. Kendall continuing to give me her most disapproving look didn't help either.

I had been holding off on visiting Isaac for a little while now. I knew if anyone would be able to see through me, it would be him. I knew I had to face him and tell him the truth about what I'd been doing, but I could already see the look of disgust and disappointment on his face, and it made me sick to my stomach.

The next morning, I woke up even more depressed than usual. After getting changed and eating a banana, I mumbled a goodbye that my parents didn't hear and stalked out to my car. I had had every intention of going to school today, but when I got into my car and started to pull away, I found myself driving on the highway towards the hospital.

I bit my lip thinking of what I had to do. I hadn't been to see Isaac in over two week, and there was no doubt about it that he would know something was wrong with me. I knew something was wrong with me and yet I couldn't do anything to stop myself.

Maybe he'll understand. He saw the state I was in when I was his roommate in the hospital. He's seen what I'm like in a depression. He pulled me out then, so why couldn't he pull me out now?

I pull into the hospital parking lot, something I have done so many times I could do it in my sleep. With every step I take closer to the building, closer to his room, closer to him, I feel more and more confident that this is the right thing to do. He can help me if I let him.

I suddenly missed him so much I was almost giddy with excitement.

I hurried up to the front desk and asked to visit him. To my shock, the nurse answered, "I'm sorry, there's no Isaac Langot in that room."

"Well that's obviously a mistake. Where else would he be?" I ask.

A younger nurse comes over, a solemn expression on her face. "You're looking for Isaac Langot?" She asks me quietly.

"Yes. I'm a friend of his, Olivia Hanson-" I start, fear bubbling up inside me.

"I'm so sorry -" she starts.

I shake my head uncontrollably, "No no no no I - I just saw him a few weeks ago, he was recovering , he - he was going to be released any day-"

"He developed another tumor, this time closer to his heart. It developed too rapidly for us to cure. He knew he was dying. When did you say you visited him?"

"Um, two, three weeks ago maybe - I..." I stutter, at a lose for words.

"He knew about his tumor two months ago. He passed away last Thursday. I'm so sorry," she continues, and I couldn't help but despise the fake sympathy on her face.