Chained Memories

Chapter 23

Crumbled

"Bakit kailangan kong maranasan lahat ng 'to?" My voice faltered as I said those words.

My heart wrench painfully.

Why?

It was a selfish thought but sometimes, we couldn't help but ask why out of all the people, we have to experience the worst.

Maraming masamang tao riyan, bakit hindi na lang sa kanila nangyari iyon? Mayroong mga humilihing na sana ay mamatay na lamang sila and some people had to go through lenghts just to threaten their life but why does it have to be us?

Why does it have to be me? Sa dinami-rami ng masasamang tao sa mundo, bakit sa akin pa nangyari ito?

Do I deserve this?

"I want to be alone..." bagsak ang balikat na tumalikod siya at marahang binuksan ang pinto.

"Nandito na ako... Hindi na kita iiwan katulad ng ginawa ko noon..." He glanced at me one more time with those sad eyes before he close the door... and that's the time I cry a river again.

All I want was to live normally because eversince... I felt like it wasn't normal at all.

It's not like I blame them for forbidding me from doing things that a normal teenage girl would do, but I can't also blame myself from thinking like that.

Come to think of it, I never remembered myself doing things I like. Palagi lang akong nakakulong sa loob ng bahay. I never experienced camping, partying (except for formal occasions), I never even experienced making friends and being surrounded with my circle of friends.

If I would think about it, it's like I never grew up in a way that a normal child should be.

I fell asleep after crying real hard with those thoughts swimming inside my head.

Hindi ko mapigilang isipin na siguro ay mayroon nga akong amnesia because if I don't have, then why can't I remember any single thing from my past?

It only makes sense.

Nagising ako bandang 11 ng umaga. I was still laying on his bed and I hate how I feel so comfortable with it.

I planned on calling my parents later when I get home. And speaking, I think I need to get home already. Dave might be worried. They might be worried about me. Hindi ako umuwi kagabi.

I heard a soft knock on the door before it slowly open. Leo's sister was behind.

"Good afternoon, lunch is already serve. We'll wait for you downstairs, take your time." She said smiling at agad din namang umalis pagkatapos sabihin iyon.

My heart pummeled in so much nervousness. Ngayon lang tuluyan rumehistro sa sistema ko na narito ako sa bahay ng lalaking hayagang sinabi ang nararamdaman niya sa akin at buong pamilya pa niya ang makakaharap ko ngayon!

Naalala ko na naman ang pag amin niya kanina. How come I didn't feel anything rather than confusion? 

Ipinilig ko ang aking ulo. I shouldn't be thinking about that. Marahan akong tumayo at inayos ang sarili. I should get myself together.

Even so my parents are close with his parents, iba pa rin iyon dahil hindi naman ako personally close sa kanila. Or am I? Because the way they talk to me, they seem so casual.

I fixed myself first. Sinigurong maayos akong haharap sa kanila maya maya lamang.

Pagbaba ko mula sa eleganteng hagdan ay sinalubong ako ng isang katulong. Magaan ang ngiting iginiya niya ako sa may dining room.