Joy had a normal student life - she was studying, she had a job, she had friends and she liked to go out from time to time.
When Yeri enters her life, things start to change.
Before writing this book, I was already developing a JoyRi fanfic that wa...
Get up... loser! It's another day of working in the soup kitchen... - That was the first thought Joy would have after waking up each day for the last three weeks. It was the end of May and even though she really didn't mind working at the soup kitchen and some days felt like they were just golden... Joy felt kind of empty inside. She felt like she wasn't fulfilling a purpose.
The only problem was that she wasn't sure what that purpose should be.
And even worse, her mood got steadily worse throughout the weeks due to her poor sleeping habits that were starting to manifest all over again.
Why was she having trouble sleeping again? Her bad dreams returned.
Come on... It's time to put on your work clothes. - She would tell to herself as she got out of bed. Okay, now like a real failure, go and get ready and after that have some "failure breakfast", won't you?
With tired eyes and ruffled hair Joy was slowly walking around the house, trying to wake herself up properly in order to function better.
Coffee? No, coffee's bad for the stomach... Tea? I guess that's better... Okay... My... How am I so tired again? Ugh, those dreams... - Joy was sitting at the living room table, looking into the distance while thinking about her breakfast.
She then got up and made some toast and tea.
She sat at an empty table. She was awake before her parents were because her shift started earlier then theirs. Welp, this toast was nice at least... Okay, time to get out and catch the bus!
And with that, Joy got out of the house and walked to the nearby bus station with her headphones on. She listened to a playlist that has been on her phone for the last three months - a combination of songs she found during the last three months and those that she listened to when she hung out with Yeri, Yena and Sakura.
Heh... Oh this one brings memories. She thought to herself as another Blondie song came to her phone.
It reminded her of the time they were all at Sakura's place. Sakura invited them because her parents were not at home that night and she didn't want to feel alone. They played beer pong that night, a game none of them played before that evening, except for Joy. She remembered how her and Yeri got super competitive while playing against Sakura and Yena. Ultimately, they lost, but they had a great time playing so they didn't feel bad about it.
That night was one of the many nights where Yena looked for answers and wanted to know if Sakura might be serious about their relationship. Even way back then, at the beginning of it all, Sakura wasn't planning on getting serious, but somehow that didn't make Yena go away. In fact, it brought them closer together for a while.
Joy envied them at that time, but wasn't ready to admit that. Sakura was playful enough so she wouldn't recognize Joy's jealous gazes. Joy didn't mind her playfulness. They even got closer as friends because Joy wasn't mad at Sakura... She was just mad because things weren't going her way.
And that's how things are feeling right now - like they are not going Joy's way as she is riding a bus to work at 6AM because her shift starts at 7AM and she has to be there early.
She does her job with a tired look on her face - her bosses are not complaining as long as the job is done. They don't talk much to Joy, and when they do, it's usually more of the same - "Oh, nice weather we're having today" or "Have you seen the line of people today? It's going to be a busy one".
Joy kept silent. Her inner thoughts were brewing and she just kept thinking about how she was getting more and more unsatisfied with her life once again. She liked living with her parents. She didn't mind this job. But something was missing.
Joy comes home later than usual because she went for a walk so that she could blankly watch the ocean and clear her mind.
Maybe I need to do something different.
She gets home and talks with her parents, enjoys her lunch and then generally helps around the house during the afternoon. Later in the evening she's in front of a screen - her laptop, phone or the TV. She's not thinking anymore, just relaxing.
And when it's time to go to bed, she's careful - she doesn't eat before going to bed and she avoids looking at her phone so that her brain can relax.
Joy falls asleep and dreams but wakes up several times during the night.
Why?
Because in her dreams, she sees Yeri.
"I thought we were done?" Joy asks.
"I thought so too, but apparently you just can't stay away." Yeri playfully smiles at her.
"What do I need to do to not have these dreams again?"
"Are you happy?" Yeri bluntly asks.
"I think s-"
"Don't think. Scan inside yourself, dork, embrace your current life and tell me - Are you happy?"
Joy stood there for a couple of moments in silence as she looked at Yeri and Yeri looked back with a smile.
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"I am not happy. Not completely." Joy finally admitted with a sigh.
"And that's okay." Yeri replied with a note of approval. Joy was a bit shocked at first but then remembered that she was basically talking to herself at this point in her dreams.
"So... What do I do?"
"Do what makes you happy, dipshit!" Yeri chuckled and she slowly started to fade away.
Joy woke up. She thought to herself - but what is it that makes me happy?
Joy got into the living room and turned on the TV. She wanted to clear her mind. It was 3AM in the morning.
A commercial was on saying that multiple Korean music companies are looking for new singers, rappers and dancers that could join these companies if they auditioned with a recording of themselves and send them to the companies in the following two weeks.
Joy stared at the TV. She thought about how she was looking at this commercial for the last three weeks, every time during the night when she would wake up from her dreams.
And every time she would scoff at the thought of doing that - auditioning for the companies.
That night Joy slept in the living room with the TV on. It was a Saturday so she didn't have to worry about waking up in the morning.
Maybe in another life I could try... Joy thought to herself before falling asleep.
