SHREK X MAO ZEDONG STRIPPER EDITION

deadbeat

"dad?"

"mao?"

they stared at each other for a while. mao then said angrily: "i'm gonna kick your ass you deadbeat son of a bitch."
he threw a few punches in his fathers direction, only slightly breaking his nose.
"why are you even here. get out of my sight."
"how could i resist the eye candy?" his father said, looking shrek up and down hungrily. "how's the wife maowy? i'm sure you could spare me one of your thousands of whores for a night?"
"not this one."
"why not? she's available? this is her job. it's not like you have any claim over her anyways."
shrek looked into mao's eyes. she started to cry. she wanted him to have claim over her. she wanted him to love him. it could never be.
"no... i.. i don't have any claim." he wish he did. he wished more than anything he was never married. he tried to forget that.
"so then why can't i have her? it's only one night.." his father said, now standing behind her, smelling her hair. she shoved him off of her.
"i'm chairman. i can do what i please. i want you to leave her the fuck alone. i should have you executed."
"maowy but i'm your old man? come on. you don't want me gone do you?" he moved his hand up and down shrek's thigh. she cried even harder, but still quietly.

he hated how his father did this to him. "he's your dad you should give him some respect" he says to himself. but with his slimey hands on her skin he couldn't help but scream at him.
"kitten lets go."
"mao, don't be ridiculous. life has been so hard for me without your mother?"
"maybe you should have considered that before you shot her."
he got in his car and shrek got in on the passenger's side. the sun had started to come up. he left his father there, alone in the middle of the street. he shouldn't feel bad. "he just tried to assault your girlfri-
your.. your friend. we're just friends."
he looked over at her tear-stained face. his heart felt like it was going to crumble.
"i'm sorry" shrek said in a small voice.
"sweetness why are you sorry? you can't help that you're so..."
"whore-looking? old man seducing?"
"nono you're neither of those things.. i was actually going to say uhm."
she was looking at him with big eyes.
"i think you're beautiful."
she smiled wide. her eyes opened even more. she screamed internally.
"but anyways let's get you home? i'm sorry you had to even see his ugly face."
"o-oh it's fine. when you're in the line of work i'm in you get used to it i guess."
"no one should ever treat you that way."
he pulled into the driveway of her apartment complex.
"well.. this is me i guess."
"..yeah."
"do you wanna come up?"
"i would like that."