Sweetheart Single

07 | Bad Boy Wannabe

Not only did I survive our first lunch date a la leaning waffle tower of pizazz, but here I am, going to a second lunch date with Shawn. My booth has a view of the front doors, and I can see Shawn walk through just on time, wearing his new team sports jacket.

"Hi Ellie," he says, sitting down at the table across from me.

"Hey," I say. I earmark my page and place P&P down on the table next to my lemonade iced tea.

"So, this needs to be quick." Shawn looks at me straight in the eyes.

"Oh." I swallow and nod. All my hopes have dissipated.

"No, no." Shawn shakes his head knowingly. "It's not like that. I have to get to the gym. Coach scheduled extra lifting before afternoon practice."

"I've been thinking about you, Elle. About us, maybe. Ah, I don't know." He looks around, awkwardly. I'm not used to this side of him. He always seemed so cool to me.

"About us?" I can't help myself from asking. "What about us?"

He's acting much more frazzled than at our last lunch.

"Well, it's so easy with us. And last year when you were in high school, I felt like I needed to be at college. No girls. Now, you're here and I think we should –maybe –I mean, I want to see you at the dance."

I am losing it inside my head right now. Shawn wants to see me? Like, actually. He didn't send the gram as a joke to be funny or because he was dared to by someone on the football team.

I concentrate on the patch of his jacket. I nod.

"So, what do you think?" Shawn's voice interrupts my thoughts.

"I don't know if I'm going to the dance," I blurt out. "I mean, I'm not sure I was going to go."

"Will you now?" Shawn asks. His head is tilted in, down, toward me. I breathe him in. "Come to the dance?"

"I will think about it," I smile. I'm not trying to be coy. I just can't focus on anything else right now. I'm blindsided.

"I like my chances," Shawn says. "Look, I have to run. Thanks for meeting me. Sorry it couldn't be breakfast for lunch again."

"No worries." I shake my head.

"I'll text you. Promise. Oh, and Andre and Joe say hey."

He smirks before standing and leaving. I'm left choking on my own words of goodbye. I don't understand this right now.

How do I feel about Shawn? I've always liked him. But now? Now how do I feel? These things don't happen to me! Shawn is cool and hot and an athlete. I am bookish and scholarly and can't play sports to save my life!

...

The next few days are a blur. I wake up for my morning routine, I go to class, go to dinner with Lucy and Darren or Nikki and Chloe. We make one late-night trip to the diner for shakes and fries. Fuel for a pop quiz I have in Lit. Shawn texts me casual things. Now he's asking what I'm doing this weekend. As if I know. It's only Thursday night!

Actually, I do know. I'm studying and writing my first paper of the semester: An Ode to Tragedies of Ancient Greece.

I try to print the assignment rubric, so I don't have to look at it on my tiny phone screen, but I realize I am out of paper. I glance at Tasha's desk, which shows no sign of collegiate life anywhere. Shoot. 9:49 PM. I have eleven minutes to make it to the bookstore and buy a pack of computer paper.

I slip into my black sweatpants and college hoodie. The mirror shows me I look a mess, especially with the topknot on my head. Oh well. I slip into my snow boots and grab my lanyard. It's a short walk across the mall lawn, so I'm hoping I won't see anyone. Or no one will see me.