The flirtation project

Part 2 - Chapter 10

carlos raised himself up until he was towering over alice. he looked down on her then turned, i saw his face. there were tears all down his cheeks and his eyes were as red as a rose. there were so many tears, more than i had ever seen from him, even when his mother had died. i felt so sorry for him. tars started streaming down my face as i saw his walk slowly to his car. i changed into gear and drove up next to the wrecked carlos.

"you ok?"he just starred forward, walking.
"look, carlos. she just-"
"you knew didnt you!"
"well yeah but-"
"HOW COULD YOU! I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND!"
"IM SORRY. I PROMISED."
"YOU PROMISED TO THAT BITCH!!"
"LOOK. I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU! I REALLY WAS!"
"WHEN. HUH? WHEN."
"THIS MORNING"
"oh my gosh, thats what you were trying to tell me. how long have you known?"
"tuesday."
"WHAT? AND YOU TLL ME NOW!"
"ATLEAST I TRIED. I TOLD HER TO TELL YOU TODAY!!"
"WELL SHE DIDNT. LEAVE ME ALONE."
"CARLOS WAIT!"
"FUCK OFF!"

tears just started streaming down my face. i bashed my head against the sterring wheel multiple times. then i drov up to alice, who was standing there, watching carlos.

"you said you would tell him." i said with the dirstiest look i could muster.
"i couldnt."
"WHY ALICE. WHY?"
"BECAUUSE I DIDNT WANT TO HURT HIM!"
"YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT WHEN YOU KISSED BEN."
"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?! WHY DO YOU CARE/ SO MUCH!"
"BECAUSE I JUST LOST A FRIEND BECAUSE OF YOU, AND HES HURT REALLY BAD."
"THATS NOT WHY."
"YES, AND THE FACT THAT YOU CHEATED ON HIM WITH SOME MODEL DUDE AND WOULD SLEEP AROUND WITH EVERYONE IF YOU COULD, YOU HAVE ENOUGH FRIENDS TO LAST A YEAR."
"your jealous, arnt you?"
"what?"
"your jealous of me. i have so many friends and two guys that want me, and i have it all. i got a job and everything. your jealous." tears started streaming down my face so hard.
"YOU KNOW WHAT? YES, I AM JEALOUS. I HAD A MASSIVE CRUSH ON CARLOS AS A GIRL AND YOU GOT HIM. THEN YOU TREATED HIM LIKE DIRT YOU BITCH!!
I HAVE FEELING FOR HIM, I STILL HAVE FEELINGS FOR ALOT OF PEOPLE. REMEBER DAN WHEN WE WERE KIDS?
I LIKED HIM TO, HE WAS GREAT. AND YOU GOT HIM!! NOT ME. NEVER ME.
YOU HAVE HEAPS OF FRIENDS THAT WANT TO HANG OUT WITH YOU AND YOU DONT EVEN KNOW HALF THEIR NAMES YOU HAVE THAT MANY.
I HAVE FOUR FRIENDS. FOUR.
ACTUALLY NO. I THINK NOW 2.
POSSIBLY EVEN ONE. I WANTED A JOB, AND YOU GOT ONE, NOT ME.
CONGRATULATIONS. YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN BETTER THAN ME. OF COURSE I WAS JEALOUS.
BUT IM NOT NOW. YOU HAD  A WONDERFUL GUY. NOT NOW.
YOU HAD A JOB. NOT NOW.
GUESS WHAT. NOW YOU KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE BITCH!!"

"jenny wait."
"SAVE IT!"

with that i changed gears and drove. i wasnt sure whether i wanted to go home or not. Q would be there and he could comfort me. but today he seemed pretty pissed at me. oh god. i hop he doesnt hate me to. and trent would be there. but so might carlos and he might have told trent. then trent would hate me to.

"fucking shit crap dick shit crap fuck dam!" i screamed in my car as loud as i could.

i decieded to leave for a while, go somewhere. where. i just started driving. i wasnt sure where i was going, but i just left. i was crying so hard i nearly couldnt see. i drove, and drove and drove. i got to a little town, when drving down the streets there were couples sitting around and kissing. and that just made me sadder, so i kept driving.

i ended up getting back to my hometown. it was nice. and i wanted to go somewhere quiet, alone. i drove around to the edge of town and followed the road up. i parked the car and lay on the bonnet. it was 8:30 now, and i was at the lookout. the same lookout i was at with Q all those years ago. i just lay there on my back looking at the stars. my hand constantly searching for someones to grab, only to remeber i was alone.

i got in the back seat of the car and used my coat fro a pillow. crying so much that the seat was drenched. i grabbed the spare coat i kept in the back, rolled it up and hugged it tight. i could never sleep without someone. up till uni when i moved in with Q i had slept wth a teddybear every night.

i slowly drifted, at times when i managed to breathe between sobs. i drifeed ever so slightly. then all of a sudden i blacked out, completely. but then i awoke. it was still dark and i had left the window open, so i was freezing. i quickly grabbed the seat cover from the front an wrapped it over myself. before crying my self  to sleep once more...

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:( poor jenny. remember to vote or comment!