Reality

Chapter 1

I walk down the busy backstage hallways, the buzz of the crowd echoing off the walls. When I reach the door at the end of the hall, I rap my knuckles on the door softly three times before opening it.

"Fifteen minutes until show time," I announce, sticking my head in the dressing room.

"Okay. Thanks, Joslyn." Addison gives me a small acknowledging smile through the vanity mirror she sits in front of as her makeup artist sprays more hairspray in her long dark brown locks.

I return the smile and close the door behind me. Gripping my clipboard tightly to my chest, I walk back down the hallway, ready to do one more run through to make sure everything is moving smoothly and on schedule.

Tonight is Addison's first big headlining show. A local L.A. radio station is sponsoring her show at a theater downtown that's packed with people. All day I've been running around with Addison, doing multiple things with the radio station sponsoring her show. She spent all morning at the station on air to promote the show and her music, followed by multiple interviews, and then going to the theater for sound check and a meet and greet with fans.

I started working for Addison as a personal assistant about four months ago when she started to blow up after the release of her first EP. It was a real struggle for me to decide whether to take this job or not, to dip my toes back in the water after a long time. But I decided it would be good for me to get back to what I used to love.

After being forced to leave my last job with Alex, I fell into a bit of a mid-midlife crisis. When I went back home, I refused to tell my dad and the rest of the guys what really happened in fear of them legitimately plotting Chris's murder. Instead, I just told them the job wasn't working out, and I wasn't sure if I even wanted to work in this industry anymore. I was so heartbroken and mortified over everything that went down that I seriously considered never working in this business again.

When I came back home, all I wanted to do was lock myself away in my room and never come out. The guys became really concerned about me at one point. I was even concerned myself, but who could I talk to?

The guys begged me to go back out on the road with them, but I couldn't stomach the thought of working my way back down the ladder and somehow accidentally spilling the beans on what actually happened with my last job. Instead, I did the unthinkable. The absolute last thing I thought I would do.

I called my mother.

Feeling so low and insecure, I began to panic on what to do next. Touring was my whole life, and after everything that happened, I couldn't wrap my head around the craziness of starting life out on the road again with a whole new person and team. Without Alex. So what could I do with my life then? Touring and eventually becoming a manager had always been my dream, but after everything that went down, I became unsure.

Nights spent alone at home, all I could hear in the silence was my mother's nagging voice ringing in my head. I could hear her clearly telling me that I'm a failure and she was right, life out on the road is not a stable career. It'll never pay the bills and I'll regret not getting a degree ten years from now.