Reality

Chapter 7

Clouds of smoke swirl around me from the numerous hits of the blunt being passed around. It's passed to Addison who's perched herself in my lap, and she takes a long drag. She lazily throws her head back, exhaling a cloud of smoke before offering the joint to me.

I glare at her, vigorously shaking my head no. You would think she'd know better.

Only a few months out of rehab, here I am, surrounded by drugs and alcohol.

I never wanted a huge album release party. I would have been completely content with sitting at home, relying on social media and my team to do all the promoting for me, but Chris insisted on having a full out party. He said it would get me more press, and therefore more sales.

I would've thought that this being my first album in three years, and all the hell I've been through, would be enough to make people want to buy it. But what do I know.

When I first learned about this party, I requested that there be no alcohol served, but Chris said guests would view that as cheap and he figured I'd be able to handle it.

I was also good with not seeing Brody again anytime soon. But here he is, invited to my party.

Out of poor judgment, I started hanging out with Brody a couple of years ago. I used to not be able to stand him, most of the time I still can't. For a while I guess you could call us friends, but really I was only using him to get drugs and alcohol to cope.

Brody was the one who initially introduce me to drugs. Alcohol was something I was already using on my own. After Joslyn left, I started going to parties Chris forced me to go to where I ran into Brody and we connected. And by connected I mean we started getting high together.

Besides Brody, another great influence I had at the time was my father. While we were never the closest, we finally seemed to reconnect due to our unhealthy habits and coping mechanisms.

My dad has never been the best father figure. Not that my mother doesn't have her flaws, too. My parents have always took advantage of and abused my fame. They let my fame get to them, not acting like my parents anymore. It only seemed like they were around to take advantage of all the perks I was getting.

Before the fame, we weren't well off. My parents spent most of their time working to keep us stable. My grandma seemed to be my primary care giver, babysitting me to help lighten my parents load. I didn't see them much as a kid, but when the fame hit it seems as though I couldn't spend a minute without them around. It would be one thing if I felt like they were around for me, but I always felt like they were more interested in the money.

As my fame grew, so did my father's ego. He decided to make a name for himself, starting up his own liquor company. This caused him to start drinking more and spiraling out of control. He started excessively partying and cheating on my mom—causing her to feel the need to cheat on him, too, and try to make a bigger name for herself.