Toxic

2. Cooking Dinner

3. May 2012

That evening when I arrived back home from work he was still away. I threw my keys on the counter, kicked off my heels and walked into the kitchen. I opened the door to the refrigerator looking for something to eat when the thought of cooking him a nice dinner crossed my mind. Quite some time had passed since the last time I had cooked something nice for him. I took out all the ingredients I would need and started preparing a pasta dish. When I raised my head to look at the clock it was 6 p.m. which meant that I had about an hour to finish cooking and put some effort into my appearance. I stirred the pasta in the pan one last time before I covered it with a lid and went into our bedroom to dress into something nice. I decided on a simple blue dress, because I knew he loved the color blue on me and let my hair out of its bun making it fall to my shoulders in loose curls. I went back downstairs and set the table, lighting a candle and putting it between the plates. I glanced at the clock once more and saw that it was 7 p.m. which meant he would be here any minute. I sat down at the table and rested my head in my hands.

I felt the time pass and looked at the clock once more only to realize than an hour had passed and there was still no sign of him. I crossed my legs and fidgeted nervously with my hands. I sat there until 11 p.m.

I had laid my head on the table and dozed off when I heard him wiggling the key in the lock. I raised my head and turned it to look at the front door. He was trying to be quiet and didn't even turn the light on afraid to wake me in case I had fallen asleep on the couch again, which happened to be a bad habit of mine.

"Where have you been, Jess?" I asked him softly. He snapped his head in my direction and looked shocked for a minute.

"Oh hey, I didn't realize you'd still be up" he smiled sheepishly.

"Jess....." I threw him a disappointed look, "Where have you been?"

He gave me a defying look "I was out celebrating that we finally made progress on our project with the guys from the construction site. Is that forbidden?"

"No.." I trailed off "but you could at least have given me a call"

"So I'm supposed to inform you of everything that I do now like you're my mom?" he asked angrily.

"No, that's not what I meant and you know it!" I raised my voice in anger. "It would simply be nice of you to tell me you won't be arriving in time for dinner so I won't get stupid ideas like preparing a nice dinner for you." I pointed to the table I had set for a romantic dinner and got up abruptly letting the chair scrape against the floor.

Lately there has been so much tension between us that the smallest things set off an argument. I was so tired of it, but at the same time I wondered if it was my fault this time ... I could have just sent him a text asking whether he would be home for dinner. Although that would have ruined the surprise and he could have been considerate by sending a text on his own. New anger flared inside of me, but at the same time I was questioning myself which caused a wave of frustration to roll over me.

I reached our bedroom, pulled my dress over my head, threw it on the ground and crashed into bed.

20. April 2007

I was so excited to see him that I couldn't stop smiling. It was the day of our anniversary and I had decided that I would cook him his favorite dish to surprise him. He was coming over later, because he thought we'd have a movie marathon and just cuddle. I couldn't wait to see his expression when he'd realize that I had made him a whole meal to celebrate.

I started chopping everything that I would later add to the pasta and hummed a tune. I threw a look at the clock to check how much time I had left and saw that I still had plenty of time to finish cooking the pasta, get ready and even make him a small desert. I happily stirred the pasta and decided to let it simmer so I could go get dressed.  I pulled a beautiful blue dress from my closet that fell to my knees and hugged my curves nicely. I braided my hair into a simple French braid and pulled some strands of hair out of the braid to make it look a bit more effortless. I finished the look by applying some red lipstick and covering my eyelashes in mascara.

I hurried back to the kitchen and got out a pudding mixture to make some chocolate pudding I could add fresh berries to that my mom had given to me when I told her I was planning on making Jess a dinner. Just as I finished making the pudding the doorbell rang and I ran to the door to buzz him in. I ripped open the door and threw myself at him. He caught me and let me wrap my arms around his neck.

"Well I am excited to see you too, babe" he grinned at me.

"Happy one year anniversary" I beamed at him and then added "Didn't think I'd be able to put up with you for this long" he grinned at this and poked his tongue out at me.

He kissed me on the cheek before setting me down on the ground and pulling a bouquet of flowers out from behind his back. I gasped and asked him if the flowers were for me. He grinned and nodded.

"I love them they are beautiful" I exclaimed.

"Just like you. You look stunning in that dress. Blue suits you" he replied cheekily making me roll my eyes at him.

"Thanks but I hope you know that flowers and compliments won't get you into my pants" I joked winking at him.

"Well good that you're not wearing any pants then"

I blushed a little at his comment and mumbled "Point to you"

I led him inside and heard him sniffing the air.

"What's that delicious smell?" he asked me.

I turned to him "Well I may or may not have cooked you your favorite meal." I smiled.

"You're absolutely perfect, Elaine, thanks!" he pulled me to him and kissed me.

"Anything for you" I mumbled against the kiss and it was true. He made me so absolutely happy that I was willing to do anything for him. I wished that things would never change and we'd always be as happy as in this moment.