Zeke Reacts to Ships

Petra x Tree

Zeke: ....

Eren: Okay, what... the absolute... fuck?

Zeke: I was just about to say that.

Eren: This... I'm... WHY?!

Zeke: This is the most savage ship we've had so far.

Eren: How would this even work?

Zeke: .....

Eren: Don't you fucking dare be a Reiner right now.

Zeke: Now I want to be a Reiner because you said that.

Eren: Zeke, don't.

Zeke: Tree sex.

Eren: ZEKE!

Zeke: *wheezes*

Eren: I said 'no'! Why would you do that?! Why would you say that?!

Zeke: *laughs* I'm sorry!

Eren: No you're not! I'm going to cry! I miss Petra.

Zeke: Only because you want that previous ship to be true.

Eren: Okay... not only do I want to score! But I do miss her!

Zeke: Okay, for serious though, this can't be shipped.

Eren: I agree. This cannot be a ship. I... just.... no.

Zeke: Okay, any other opinions before we rate?

Eren: Hmm... I just want to know who did this.

Zeke: Whoever did it, must've been a savage or something because Dammmn!

Eren: I don't ship it. I can't ship it. It makes NO sense. Just... no.

Zeke: Okay, before we rate, let me just point something out.

Eren: What?

Zeke: I know that Annie stomped Petra against a tree but, isn't the tree the real killer?

Eren: The fuck?! No! What made you think that?

Zeke: Well... The impact on the tree and Annie's Titan foot killed Petra. So, not only did Annie stomp her, but the tree killed her too.

Eren: Zeke?... Why?

0/10

-1000/10