Abyss - Book Five of the Alpha Series - MxM

Chapter 37

The divide between us and them has never been so clear. While it did affect Fillipa to some extent, the regret that our actions caused seemed to fall squarely on my shoulders. Haryek felt little remorse for commoners who stepped out of line, considering that he thought agitators of any sort should be punished. 

Anuetta was happy to claim that it was my fault they died. If I hadn't listened to Loan, the magic users would have never revealed themselves. With that in mind, I spent the rest of my trip in my room, feeling less than enthusiastic about the decisions I had made to earn their favor.

Verando was as much help as he could be, but with Loan only able to heal me in small increments, my warlord remained at arm's length. The way I coped was by distraction with physical touch and intimacy, and Verando was vehemently opposed to such options.

To pass the time, I practiced with moths and small insects that lived on the train while everyone else slept. In truth, I accidentally caused them to explode and felt worse about myself for ending even more lives. 

The retreat of my lycan lover was starting to affect me. While I understood he didn't want to hurt me, the rejection was just as painful. 

Arriving at the next station brought more frustration, as the Austrian city seemed unwilling to let us in, much to Verando's relief. Their support for the 'Good King' allowed us to rest in a local tavern until our next train arrived to take us the short distance to Paris, France. 

Finally, after more days than I cared to recount, we had arrived in France.

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Much to my dismay, France was not enthusiastic about their part in our war. To keep me out of their King's court, Anuetta was excited to show us all the luxuries her city had to offer, and by the second week of our stay, travel had begun to bore me. 

It was as if she were trying to repay the debt of a time that had been foul for all in Hungary. Only, this wasn't the traveling I longed for, historic and long-winded, taking most of my day until I was so exhausted at night I could hardly make it to my bedroom. With no museums, art shows, or music, the tour consisted of an explanation of current and past royalty, providing more context for our future court proceedings. 

However, my limited ability to speak French made appreciating it difficult. 

When I could muster up any energy, Verando helped by giving me lessons. Romanian was close, in a way, but I was having a hard time dropping my Slavic undertones and allowing the correct pronunciation to come through. While it pleased me to see him so amused, failing at something like this was hard to swallow.

My mother had worked hard to encourage us to learn English, but not the neighboring tongues.

His eloquent way of speaking made my meager attempts sound like a scratched chalkboard, though I was making progress considering the French found my butchering of their language amusing. 

I found myself gravitating toward Fillipa, a bride-to-be, learning the language and following the commonwealth's mistresses around. While she wasn't my preference, I did enjoy her company and knew she was struggling as I was. 

While society had forced me to include the woman at my side, it didn't mean we couldn't form a bond. Playing dress up with the women killed her as much as my routine drove me to madness. When I wasn't touring the archives, I sat through lectures with Haryek, who had taken to encouraging day drinking. 

In truth, the drink became the only way to stomach healing ribs and sarcasm in a language I couldn't understand; free-flowing wine was a means to survive. With water purification questionable, I struggled to find issues with alcohol as an alternative.