Abyss - Book Five of the Alpha Series - MxM

Chapter 31

The slow, rhythmic clack and the low hum of our descent across the tracks threaten to lull me to sleep. I sit quietly on the small couch, reading one of the dusty romance novels in the dim light of one of the multiple flickering lanterns. The broad windows along the sides of the car show back nothing but our reflections and darkness as night has fallen upon us once more. 

There's an odd calm over the members of our group, without the more excitable components, it seems there is almost a void in the energy. Haryek sits on the floor, leaning back into Loan's lap as the solomonari casually braids the long mane, and Anuetta sits in front of Haryek, receiving the same. 

Of course, the elf prince is who she would have sided with, and how peculiar that Kymil did not make it out of the castle, but Hayek did. I could have sworn I saw him, and yet, now I can hardly recall. The past few days have been such a blur. Regardless, I make a mental note to confront him on that when we have a moment alone.

The train car is home-like, much like a study or a lounging area. 

The heavy carpets and plush furniture bear much more comfort than our carriages and the inn beds. I'm reluctant to retire to bed, given that I've finally found a comfortable way to lie, my gaze flicks toward the clock ticking down the hours. My arm aches even more now that Helen has splinted it, and the idea of trying to sleep in any way feels almost as displeasing as the thought of getting up.

Turning back to my book, I lose myself in the world of whirlwind romances, undying love, and devotion. There was a time when books such as these were merely a guilty pleasure, a tease of something I didn't want, but now they had piqued my interest with the mindless fluff and obsession that filled their pages. 

With our secrets, intensity, and the fact that the concept of someone loving me still felt so new, I struggled with imagining how we would fit into a society that didn't want us to be together. Could I continue pretending to love Fillipa in public and then sneak away to be with him at night? 

Was that fair to him? 

Fillipa packs up the remainder of our dinner, placing it into the ice chest while Sana seems to be doing some fitness exercises in a small corner she cleared for her purposes. Poor Helen sits on her back, cross-legged, as she remains motionless. 

The pale-haired girl looks only mildly traumatized, and I can't help but think she's earned her punishment of being a piece of equipment. That's all she appears to be suitable for, a burden to be carried. 

I set my book down as my thoughts centered on the person I've been reluctant to look at all night. 

Verando sits in the window seat, distancing himself from us, from me, from everything.

I didn't press him when he didn't eat, as I'm familiar with how futile those attempts are, nor did I  pull him out of his sulking to engage with us. 

Admittedly, I'm not quite sure what to do with him. Usually, I'd wait for Tomas or Reid to drag him out of his melancholy. But with nothing to do until we arrive in France, it seemed there was little to distract any of us from what we'd left behind. A family separated, two men sent to a war that they would not return from, and the reality that his daughter might never know him weighed heavily on us both.

What hadn't materialized in my mind at the time of our departure was that lycans are pack animals. We had Aiden, but not the sort of family bonds he had had the entire time I'd known him. 

I was thrilled to escape the city, to shop and be a human again, to step away from the aggression and danger that came with war and beasts. But it hadn't dawned on me how uncomfortable that might be for him. I'd often forgotten that he was a slave only a short time ago.