I took heavy breaths prepping myself for what's to come. My hands were shaking ever so slightly which only people paying attention would notice.
"Are you sure you want to do this? We can go back home." Deckard said softly to me.
We were sitting at a table in a prison waiting to talk to my father in L.A. I hadn't seen him since I was 14 and I was 21 now, so you could see why I was anxious.
I shook my head finalizing my decision "No, I got this. I need to see him." I said not even looking at him. I heard him hum in response and squeezed our interlocked hands softly.
A loud buzz was heard behind us and a door opening. I heard a chain hitting the ground and footsteps. I turned around to see my father.
He had a long beard and buzz cut revealing the tattoo on his neck. "Papa," I said getting to my feet. I saw a smile form on his face and he opened up his arms for a hug. I walked over and hugged him and he chuckled and kissed the crown of my head. "How are you, my girl?" He asked with a rasp. "Good, I have so much to tell you," I told him and he smiled. We pulled away from the hug and walked back to the table. He sat across from Deckard and I and he held a suspicious look on Deckard.
"Niki, who is this man?" He asked his Samoan accent coming out. I smiled looking at Deckard and he smiled. I lifted our interlocked hands onto the table reveal the wedding ring and my father's eyes widened.
"You're married?" He asked and I smiled and nodded. "2 years now. I know you would've wanted to know before but we had a lot going on. So I'm sorry." I apologized but he only shook his head. "Niki, don't be sorry. I understand but at least tell me you have talked to your mom and Jonah." He said making me go silent. He noticed my unusual silence and he shook his head in disappointment.
"Niki, I told you one thing when I left. Do you remember?" He asked and I nodded looking down at the table. "Keep Mumma safe," I said softly. "KEEP YOUR MOTHER SAFE! BUT YOU DECIDED TO RUN OF WITH LUKE! The least you could've done was keep in contact with them after everything that happened." He yelled making me flinch. "I'm sorry Papa-" I said with tears brimming in my eyes but he cut me off. "SORRY ISN'T GOING TO CUT IT! YOU ARE NOT APART OF MY FAMILY ANYMORE!" he yelled making tears pool from my eyes. "Mate, you better cool it before I break your fucking neck," Deckard growled making me shake my head and grabbing his forearm trying to fight the tears back.
"Don't worry about it Deck. He has no family either way because we all left him. I stayed with him out of pity when I could be apart of a loving family and not forgotten like him. He brought nothing but pain to our family and I don't want no man like that to be my father." I growled seeing my dad's face change from anger to sadness.
I shot up from my seat and stood over the man I called dad. Tears blurring my vision making it hard to see. I turned around and left with Deckard hot on my trail.
Once outside, the sun hit me like a brick with heat. I walked away from the prison with my head down taking every being from holding back my sobs. Deckard grabbed my shoulder and whipped me around facing him and pulling me into his chest.
I released all the sobs couped up inside me and tears dripped onto his shirt. I wanted to keep the connection I had with my father before he left but I knew it wouldn't work. I was dumb to think it would.
I gripped onto Deckard's shirt as tight as possible not wanting to be away from his arms.
"Let's go home. I got some big plans for us." He said and I smiled sniffling.
"Let's go," I said pulling away to look at the love of my life.
How did I get so lucky to have him as my husband? He was perfect for me and he understood me...well, at a certain length.
We got into his Jaguar 2020 Jaguar F-Type and rolling down the windows. I connected my phone to the Bluetooth from the screen in the centre of the dash. I played NF Let You Down and started staring out the window letting the lyrics blast through the speakers of the vehicle.
Feels like we're on the edge right now
I wish that I could say I'm proud
I'm sorry that I let you down
Let you down
All these voices in my head get loud
I wish that I could shut them out
I'm sorry that I let you down
L-l-let you down
I felt a tear stream down my face and I shut my eyes and bit my lips trying to avoid letting a sob escape.
Yeah, I guess I'm a disappointment
Doing everything I can, I don't wanna make you disappointed
It's annoying
I just wanna make you feel like everything I ever did wasn't ever tryna make an issue for you
But, I guess the more you
Thought about everything, you were never even wrong in the first place, right?
Yeah, I'ma just ignore you
Walking towards you, with my head down, lookin' at the ground, I'm embarrassed for you
Paranoia, what did I do wrong this time? That's parents for you
Very loyal?
Shoulda had my back, but you put a knife in it, my hands are full
What else should I carry for you?
I cared for you, but
A quiet sob escaped my lips and I felt Deckard rest his hand on my thigh. I turned my head to see him staring at me with worried eyes. I rested my head on his shoulder and he left a soft kiss on the crown of my head.
"Don't worry, you won't see him anymore."
