Stay Beautiful Keep It Ugly

Chapter 12

               I really hated eating. I didn’t want to. I was too fat and with every bit of the crappy school salad I ate, I felt fatter. Even though I didn’t want to eat, I didn’t want to explain myself, I didn’t want to cause any suspicions, and I didn’t want to talk about it, so I put a smile on my face and acted like I enjoyed the hideous tasting food and that I wasn’t upset by how fat I was. I was just going to have to swallow every bite of the food and settle for throwing it back up when I was done.

               I squeezed Mikey’s hand whenever he looked over at me, probably because I was taking too long to eat another bite. I smiled as I shoved a tomato into my mouth. Too late now to say I didn’t like tomatoes, which was the true, they taste horrible, and pick around them. I tried not to gag as I chewed the cherry tomato.

“I still don’t think you two aren’t dating!” Frank sang, laying a crossed the lunch table. Poor Mikey, his face was fifty shades of red.

“Well, we aren’t. Get over it,” I told him, pushing his arm away from me.

“Prove it,” Frank rolled onto his back, now laying completely on the table.

“Um, w-well, ah, I-,” Mikey was turning the shade of a tomato.

“I have a date of Thursday,” I told them, somewhat to prove that Mikey and I weren’t dating, somewhat to push the fact out there that I, Toria Rose Summers, had a date with one hot mother fucker, also known as, Gerard I-Don’t-Give-A-Damn-What-His-Middle-Name-Is Whatever-The-Fuck-His-Last-Name-Is.

“With Mikey!” Frank yelled, causing Mikey to blush a deeper color red.

“No, with Mystery Man Number 1, from my art class,” I stuck my tongue out at Frank. He gasped at me, then sat up, completely serious.

“You and the guy we were bugging you about are going out on a date? We haven’t even meet him, and you’re going out on a date with him! Tori, Ray and I have to meet him first and make sure he isn’t some rapist! And, if we approve, we have to  give him the good word! Right, Ray?” Frank hit the palm of his hand with his fist when he said ‘the good word.’

“Nah, I don’t think Tori needs a babysitter. She’s old enough to make her own decisions, even if they are her going out on a date with a rapist or sociopathic killer. I hope she haves fun on her date,” Ray said, leaving Frank speechless and upset. I think he just really wanted to beat up Gerard, using Ray’s height to his advantage.

“But Ray!” Frank whined.

“No, no, he’s r-right. T-Tori can d-date whatev-ever sociopath sh-she wants t-to,” Mikey spoke up.

“Mike-,” Frank was going to whine again, but I cut him off, “he is a rapist. That’s our first date- He’s going to rape me, then kill me, then dump my body into the dumpster behind the school. I’ll be sitting there, rotting, as you guys and my dad wonder where I went and what happened to me. Him and I planned it all out.” Frank giggled and said, “Good luck with that,” before he laid back down on the table. I smiled and took, reluctantly, a bite of my food. I felt so fat, eating.

    “Hey, Tori, you okay?” Ray asked me after a few minutes of Mikey, Frank, and him talking. I forced a smile on my face and said, “Yeah, I’m fine? Why won’t I be?”

“First of all, your hands are shaking, second, you look like you’re going to be sick, and third, you look really pale, almost like you’re scared,” Frank told me. I looked at my hand, the one that wasn’t being held by Mikey, and noticed that it was shaking worse that a leaf in a wind storm. I set down my fork and placed my shaking hand in my lap. Mikey squeezed my other hand and said, “Tori, is something wrong?” I shook my head and dropped Mikey’s hand.