ryelo ren sat in his tree. he wnated to fuck. fuck the girl. the girl who had escaped his grasp.
"motherfucker i'm so angry." he said.
his tree was big and long, sturdy and hard. the bark weaved up the trunk like veins. the grass that grew at its base curled up the sides like a bunch of green pubes. he was sexually frustrated and this big ol tree was bouta make him act up.
he wondered if he could fit a whole tree up his ass. he was a master of the force, after all. he was just itching to be pegged by that jedi lady. he bet she had a whole wall of straps in her house, just fifty shades of greying that shit. god he was fucking HORNY.
he devised a plan. using the force, he'd lift the tree out of the ground, and using his powers, stretch his asshole to an unimaginable size to fit it in. yes, thats it. the perfect plan. his body craved the bark of the trunk inside of him, the texture dragging against his wet caverns.
so he vaporized his clothing off and jumped down to the ground. he lifted the tree out of the dirt.
"HEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJSKJJJJJJJJJJJ" he said, exasperated.
he was on his hands and knees now. with all his jedi force stregnth, he stretched and stretched his asshole open until the skin felt like rubber. it was as wide as a water park tube slide. and with the last of his strength, he jammed the trunk into him.
"FUCKING OUCH." he said, angrily. nonetheless this bitch kept thrusting. he felt the rest of his skin begin to tear. but he was drowning in ecologically friendly pleasure. god, is this what the lorax wanted for us? was this the future he saw in his mind? sweaty adam driver being anally penetrated by a fucking tree? can't speak for the trees now motherfucker they're all up in kylo ren's bussy.
while he climaxed he shoved the tree SO FUCKING FAR up his ass his body split in two. his ribs cracked open and splintered out of his GODDAMN chest. so he lay there, bleeding and penetrated, heaving heavily.
suddenly rey showed up.
"right whats all this then." she said.
"rey please help me i'm fucking dying here."
"yea... bit sad innit. alright off ya pop, get up on it."
"rey pleas... pl... ple sei m fuckin g dead...ing dying..."
rey looked down at him pitifully. she knew what she needed to do. the woman threw herself down onto him and began to scream.
"ah." she screamed.
a blinding white light shot from adma diver's open chest. the tree, still hanging out of his juicy bussy, coiled and curled around the two. kylo ren couldn't see for shit, but he could tell... rey was transforming. and he was healing.
they both rose up. the force brought them into each other's embrace as they passionately made out in midair. fucking metal. kylo's ass felt less sore, and his ribcage had been sewn back together. when he opened his eyes, he saw the most beautiful sight.
as they drifted back down to earth, rey unsheathed the massive tree strap she was totting. it was bigger than any dick he had seen. holy macaroni he was drooling.
"oi now bend over, luv."
and so he did. and then they had multiple children. all the children. you are children. your paranets kylo and reeses peices. fucking hell.
