How to Steal a Heart

~ Chapter 8 ~

"I hate you."

Whether I really meant it or not, I don't know. I know that I absolutely mean it in this moment. It takes a different kind of person to hit your own daughter out of annoyance. No matter how angry I am, I can't deny the little girl in me wanting my father to be sorry for what he'd done. I wanted him to chase after me as I stomped out of the house. I wanted him to beg for forgiveness after everything he's put our family through, for that man he's become. 

That was never going to happen. I knew it. He knew it. The whore he lays with at night knew it.

That bitch is no better

She may have gasped when he hit me, but she didn't do anything. She would probably stay with my father just like my mother did. My father would obviously get tired of her. Maybe throw her around a bit before casting her aside. 

I sniffled softly under the dark sky. I was quickly out of the house soon after the incident. If I stayed any longer I would've started to do something I'd regret. 

I sigh, trying to calm myself down with the cool air. I had so much fun earlier tonight. A small part of me thought everything was going to be okay. That I was starting to get my life together. A childish assumption - I just believed that I'd become a new person, that I'd had a new awakening. It's silly, I know. Of course, my father has to remind me that he controls every aspect of my life. 

How could I ever forget? I know who I am. 

I wasn't paying mind to my surroundings. I just let my feet take me where they wanted. As soon as I set eyes on the old playground. I let the tears roll. My chest heaves as my hands trace the swing seat I'd always pick. Flashbacks of past memories and smiles flow in and out of my mind. 

Things haven't ever been good, but they've always been simple.

I sit on the swing, the salty tears that fell on my face only irritated my stinging cheek. I've never had anyone to count on. My mother's always been emotionally unstable and my father's always been stubborn. That's the way it's always been. 

I keep a lot to myself because it's hard to come across people who understand. I hate that I'm still hoping for a happy ending with all my family. How do you let go of your parent? Especially if they're still living. I know what I have to do. I just can't bring myself to do it.

What do you do when that happens?

How do you find the courage?

How do you let go?

Truth: You cannot change things by loving them harder.

I've already tried.

I wonder, if I died, who would leave flowers at my grave? I think I know the answer, but in efforts to protect myself, I won't voice it. I often think that if I acted like I wasn't hurting; then it wouldn't hurt. That doesn't work. I still feel very much hurt, I've only added the loneliness to it. 

I try to stand, feeling like I was suffocating from the lack of air. My chest movements were erratic. It didn't help that tears were blurring my eyes from the already dark scene. My knees weaken, but before I can hit the ground large arms wrap around me. They pull me against a hard chest, holding me upright. I wasn't scared because I knew that familiar smell all too well. 

"Victoria?" His voice is hushed, "What's wrong?"

I don't answer, just relaxing in his arms. He seems to understand as he doesn't speak for a while. He just holds me under the moonlight. Softly rocking back in forth, he coos into my hair. My crying comes to a slow halt and thought's begin to unfog. 

"Are you going to tell me what upset you, baby?" He pulls his head back from me. His eyes immediately go to my cheek. I hadn't known it was that noticeable. If he could see it in such dim lighting, it was going to be a bitch to cover in the morning. "Who the fuck did that to your face?"

His voice was no longer calm, it had now come off harsh. It echoed through the deserted park. A quick thought came across my mind: What was he doing here? Axel didn't come off as the person to just go for midnight strolls through a playground, but who am I to judge? I guess I didn't either. 

"It doesn't matter." I remove myself from his hold, he lets me. 

"I'll be damned!"

"And what are you going to do about it, Axel? Beat him up?"

"That's a hell of a good start," He exasperated, I shake my head. 

"Then what?" I look directly into his beautiful grey eyes, "Then everything goes back to the way it was. Me in my situations and you in yours?"

"Don't talk to me like that?" He utters.

I give him a pointed look, "Like what?"

"Like I don't care,"

"Do you?" I raise a brow, "Everyone cares, Stone. It's not about caring,"

He hesitates, "Then what are you expecting?"

"From you? Nothing. I don't want you to do anything, I don't want you to think about it anymore. I want you to continue as if this never happened." I back away from him, "I know I will," 

"You have a handprint on your face, yet you still can't pull that stick from your ass. I asked who hurt you-"

"And I told you to drop it!" I looked at him wildly. He was upsetting me. I had a feeling that soon there was going to be a turn in the conversation and someone was going to get hurt. Someone was going to say something they didn't mean.

"You just have to make everything so fucking difficult, huh?" Axel tugs at his roots. I look away from him.

"You don't want me to care? Fine." He throws his hands up, "Go back to the loser that hit you. Then next time you can cry in that large house of yours. In fact, Go wipe your tears with daddy's money, princess."

Bingo! It was me. I was the one that was going to get hurt. 

I won't lie. His words cut deeper than Olivia's could ever. I couldn't help the tears forming in my eyes, but I fought like hell to not let them fall. Not yet, not while he was watching. I wanted to come back at him. I wanted to tell him, that I indeed, would wipe my eyes with hundred dollar bills tonight. However, my throat constricted. 

"Fuck you." My voice comes out soft, not weak. It was meaningful just not loud. Axel's jaw unclenched. "Next time you see me, don't talk to me, okay?" 

"I mean, it Axel." I push him, he doesn't move. "I might take shit from other people in my life, that is beyond my control, but this-" I gesture to him, "I will not take this from you."

"Just remember I didn't ask you to come over here and ask me what's going on. I didn't ask you to care. I especially didn't ask for your fucking judgment!" I seethe.

"You're right, I will go home to my big house. I'll go home and forget all about you."