Love Awaits

twelve

I wake up. I don't know where I am exactly, until I realize I'm in Ashtons house. I check the time, great. 2;23 pm. I get up and walk down the stairs to smell burnt toast and coffee.
"Hi love" Ashton nervously smiles.
"I made breakfast, it's not very good but I have some coffee here for you, just the way you like it." he takes a sip of his lemonade that he made earlier.
I just smile back and take a sip of my coffee, oh my gosh it tastes so good.
"This is so good" I sigh.
"You were sleeping quite a while" Ash smirks.
"Yeah I guess, why didn't you wake me up earlier?"
"I wanted to surprise you with breakfast, although this happened." he giggles. it's so cute.
"I have practice with the band, I'll see you soon okay? Unless you want to follow, I can wait." Ashton says.
"I have to take a shower and get ready which will take like an hour"
"Take a shower at Luke's"
"What?" I stutter, that's a weird thought.
"Never mind, I'll wait here, go shower" he points to the stairs.
I kiss his cheek and rush up the stairs to get ready.
-
As I walk down the stairs ready to go out I spot Ash laying on the couch snoring like the man he is, I chuckle and jump on the tiny empty spot beside him.
He flutters his eyes open, and smiles.
"All ready?" he asks yawning.
"Let's go!" I smile.
-
it's a short drive to Luke's, I don't know why they're practicing there anyways.
As we pull out of the driveway I spot Luke in Calums arms sobbing, I rush out of the vehicle and up to them with Ashton not too far behind.
"Luke whats wrong?" I ask fearfully, knowing it's about Mikey.
"He doesn't want to be here" he takes a deep breath.
"What do you mean?" Ashton asks quietly.
"He doesn't want to be around us, not even me. And I don't know why." he starts sobbing uncontrollably.
"But why?" I snuggle into Ashton.
"I don't know" Calum says and I look at him.
Why is Calum so dreamy?
We walk into the house only to see Michael sitting at the kitchen table waiting patiently for some company.
"Hello Nevaeh, Ashton" he smiles.
"Hi Mikey" I smile back.
"Hey" is all Ash could say.
"Well, I should go" Michael insists.
"No, you can't go!" Luke shouts while Calum holds him back from anything.
"What Luke is trying to say-" Ashton pauses.
"Is that you probably should stay, you know, maybe throughout the first song or so" He smiles.
"Alright but one song only and I'm out" He walks with us to the living room where his guitar lays.
"I don't understand" I whisper to myself.
"Me neither." Ashton whispers back.
Ashton doesn't know why I said that, he thinks he does but he doesn't.
I don't want Ashton, I mean I love him so very much. But I want Calum. He's all I ever wanted, two years ago, today and every night since. I need him. He is my everything.
-
It was a short practice, I mean Michael stayed for another song and that was about it.
Calum and I decided to go for a walk with Luke while Ash brings Michael home.
"Calum" I say looking at him.
"Nevaeh" Calum smiles.
"Do you love me?" I ask and Luke fiddles around with his feet wanting to leave this awkward moment.
"Why would you ask that? Why the fuck would you ask that?" Calum seems angry.
"I just-"
"Of coarse I fucking love you! Nevaeh you are my everything! But theres a problem, you also have an everything, he has your heart and your soul and everything you have, including your love. And mine all belongs to you, you are the love of my life, and I just want you, but you have him. Nevaeh, I love you, but you love him more." he walks away after seeing the tears go down my cheek as Luke rushes to comfort me.
"Calum" I whisper.
"I love you"