Population Zero

Chapter Sixteen

I hadn't been to the compound's cemetery since I lived in the west wing after the meningitis outbreak but it seems like nothing has changed since then. There didn't seem to be an influx of new graves and I couldn't see any other fresh plots indicating that anyone had recently died. No new graves unless you count Dustin's. His suicide seemed to send shockwaves throughout the compound. No one was prepared for a youth officer's death especially under such circumstances. I was still trying to process it myself. My eyes were so puffy and dark looking when I checked them in the mirror this morning but it wasn't from crying. I hadn't cried since my outburst yesterday in the cafeteria.

Last night Renzo kept me up into the early hours of the morning telling stories of Dustin and how he was there for him when no one else was. Apparently from a very young age Renzo suffered from acute anxiety disorder and as a result was heavily prescribed anti anxiety medication which he went on to become addicted to. He said he had gotten into so many fights with the other kids because they were constantly making fun of him due to him being so overweight. I couldn't imagine him being overweight now, he had a very toned and muscular build, tall and strong. Once when they went on a nature hike up Hunter Peak which is a small mountain at the far west of the compound and got into a pretty heated fight with an older boy who wouldn't stop teasing him about climbing so slowly. He pushed the boy so hard with all his weight he knocked the boy off a cliff where he fell to his death. Thanks to Dustin it was ruled an accident. Renzo says Dustin saves his life that day and made a vow to him to change for better. He found his love of music, Jesus, and veganism to keep him going. Honestly, it explained so much about him and I felt like I finally understood why he was the way he was. I was thankful for the talk and more insights into the kindness Dustin spread but honestly he kept me up so late and I was exhausted and desperate for some sleep. Even after he finally fell silent I found it difficult to fall asleep.

I tossed and turned all night thinking about his story, how Dustin saved him, and his suicide that by the time the youth officers did their morning call to wake up,  I couldn't even remember what day it was. Worst of all, I had changed into my ceremonial garb only to realize the pants were too short. They sat right above my ankles and left the last pair of my white, sweat stained socks plain for all to see. I guess I didn't realize how long it had been since I last wore them. I noticed a few other kids with the same problem, including Renzo, so I tried not to let it bother me. I don't think anyone would have noticed anyway because the whole funeral was a disorganized mess. No one knew who was supposed to read the eulogy and fights kept breaking out between the boys and the youth officers. When they finally lowered Dustin's body into the grave reality started to hit that he was really gone. The youths were allowed to stay and visit as long as they liked and afterwards there was going to be a feast in the teenage wing's cafeteria where everyone could gather and eat together in remembrance. After the ceremony was over, I wandered through the cemetery for a bit looking at the different tombstones and trying to see if I recognized any of the names. After rows and rows of tombstones I finally came across a name I recognized. Frank 739.  I stopped and stood still, staring at the name etched into the rock. Frank was the youngest youth officer I ever remember meeting. I couldn't even tell he was an adult when I first met him. He looked like a youth himself. I thought back to the times he would take me riding out on the ATV's and all the conversations we had. Little did I know I would be headed to Youth Quest to begin my training so young. He was so brave. A little too brave for his own good though. I heard years down the line from the time we spent together that he tried to escape and make it into the female compound against orders. He was shot and killed and served as a warning to those who ever sought to break out. I stumbled on his ID card during the funeral wake just before they prepared him for his burial. No one noticed me swipe it off of him and to this day no one knows that I took it. Nobody but Asher. I must have read his tombstone a thousand times, "Beware the pull of the female species. Only death will come of it." I stood a while longer contemplating the significance of this warning as I felt a hand touch my shoulder. I turned around to see Elijah's eyes staring into mine. "Lucas. I was looking everywhere for you. I have something that belongs to you." He said as she shoved something into my right pocket in my way too small pants and it bulged out indiscreetly. "What is this?" I asked as I reached into my pocket to retrieve it. "No! Don't take it out. I'll tell you what it is just don't take it out!" He said in a quiet panic. "Well what is it then, Elijah?" I asked. "It's Dustin's telepad." He answered. "What? How did you get this? I thought it was .." he grabbed both my arms and tried to quiet me by loudly shushing. "Quiet, Lucas! Before someone hears you. Let me explain. Quiet down! I'll explain everything." He squeezed my shoulders tighter and continued, "Dustin gave this to me the day before he died. He told me to hold on to it and keep it safe. He said it was the key to escaping. He told me they kept secrets in the female compound and that I should escape this place before it was too late. But I'm not brave, Lucas. I can't do it. You are brave! You once almost escaped with Asher. You take it. You can escape! There is no hope for me..." He whispered loudly in my ear as she groped the lump in my pocket. Just as he finished his appeal, Eric walked by looking suspiciously at us both. Elijah threw his arms around me in a hug and started sobbing. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my head into his chest and this display was enough to get Eric to walk past us satisfied. "Lucas. This was Dustin's final wish. I've passed it off to you. If he knew you were alive he would have chosen you and not me." He looked deeply into my eyes and I saw the desperation. How could I escape now knowing what happened to Asher? But how could I refuse a man's dying wish? I took Elijah into my arms once more as he apologized to me for standing in my way before. We promised to remain friends no matter what happened. As I left to return straight to the teenage wing I wondered if I would ever see Elijah again. I never made the promise that I would use the telepad to escape but he didn't seem to notice. I cupped it tightly in my hands through my pocket as I made my way back to my room. Renzo and Fabian greeted me there.

"Hey, roomie!" Said Fabian. "Whatcha got in your pocket?"

"What do you mean roomie?" I blurted out defensively. I turned to Renzo and looked into his eyes to see if this was really true. Renzo nodded and shrugged as he lay across his bed with Lola strung over his lap. "So, what's in your pocket then?" He raised his eyebrows and a sly grin crept onto his lips. I grabbed my pocket tight and leapt across the room towards my bed when Fabian body slammed me into the dark hardwood floor. Renzo threw Lola off of him, jumped out of bed, and piled on top of me in a matter of seconds and before I knew it they had my arms crossed behind my back with my cheek burning into the ground with just enough room for one nostril to suck in a little air. Fabian slid his hand underneath my hip and grabbed for my pocket, cupping my privates for a moment which caused me to jerk so hard I knocked Renzo straight off. Fabian's hand continued on toward the telepad with no hesitation and he soon slid it out realizing immediately what it was and shouting loudly, "It's Dustin's telepad! You thief! I can't believe you stole a dead man's telepad!"

"Let me see that!" Screamed Renzo jumping at  Fabian but Fabian dodged his attempts and held the telepad high into the air climbing onto his bed to get a closer look at it. I laid on the floor feeling defeated and violated as a hardness grew in my pants. Fabian and Renzo continued their struggle as I laid stiff and motionless on the floor. Finally, they called truce and each sat at the edge of Renzo's bed to study it. "How did you even get this?" Fabian asked. "He's a thief." Responded Renzo. "He steals everything. I found a box under his bed with tons of random things like lighters and cigarettes. He even has an old ID card from a youth officer. I don't know how he gets these things." He says as he turns the telepad over trying to figure out how to turn it on. "Oh. Here is the switch." He says. "No!" I jump up as my erection springs free from its constraints and bobbles up and down as I attempt to snatch it out of Renzo's hand. They are both far too preoccupied with my growth to try to fight me back and I grab it easily and shove it back into my ridiculously tight pants. I curse them for a moment and remind myself to toss them in the donation basket as soon as I take them off. "You idiots! If you turn this on it could activate some sort of alarm! The whole wing could be raided and they would haul all our asses off to the adult compound to work ourselves to death. Is that what you want?" I shouted angrily. They both just stared at me, jaws dropped in shock at what they were witnessing. I rolled my eyes and threw myself onto my bed stuffing the telepad tightly under my mattress. "Oh, please. Like you've never seen an erection." Renzo and Fabian looked at each other and instantly looked embarrassed. Renzo shrugged his shoulders and said "I can't get one anymore. Neither can Fabian. We thought that was normal." He said. "What? I get them all the time. I wake up with one every morning." I replied stunned. I thought I was normal. I thought back to my conversation with Renzo's old roommate, Derek. He had talked about sexual repression pills. Maybe Dustin put me on a different pill than everyone else. After a super awkward conversation with my roommates where Fabian tried to convince me to take off my pants and Renzo asking me a zillion questions about my sexual dreams, things finally calmed down enough to get back on topic. Apparently Fabian had been transferred to our room after Dustin's funeral so it will be the three of us in here from now on. Not much else has changed since our new youth officer, Zach has started taking over for Dustin. Zach is a little slow because he's been out on retirement so long and isn't as familiar with all of the rules and restrictions. Because of this, the three of us have been taking advantage by convincing him that level 4's don't have to work on the farm. We mostly spend the day doing recreational activities or simple chores around the compound. It's actually been a lot of fun hanging out with Renzo and Fabian and I feel like we are becoming friends. They've stopped teasing me about being the favorite and Renzo hasn't even hounded me about my diet although I have stopped drinking milk. The last time I was this close to a youth was Elijah. I miss him a lot. I still think about Asher every day too but I tell myself it was for the best that I left. I was never as strong or brave as him. I would have never survived. I start Youth Quest soon and it makes me sad to think we can't just live like this forever. Hanging out and talking and messing around is the best but I know it has to come to an end sometime. After all, I have to fulfill my duty to Dustin. He always wanted me to be a youth officer and I think it would be a good way to honor his death. As for all of that telepad business from Elijah, I really don't even know if what he was saying was true. It doesn't sound like something Dustin would say. The telepad has been resting tightly under my mattress since I first placed it there and now I have Renzo and Fabian on my side to help me protect it. Eric had said something about holding on to an item that belonged to a loved one serving as a tribute to them. Dustin's telepad is my tribute and reminder. I am ready to dedicate my life to the youth and help them in any way that I can. That's really the best way I can honor Dustin. Every day that passes it's a little closer to the end of an era. I meet up with Van Whittle tomorrow to discuss the arrangements and he said he has a surprise for me. I hope it's a book!