jiyoo had begun to question her life choices when she climbed in the crowded van.
as everyone was climbing in, taehyung poked his head out the window and said, "come on little girl...I have candy in the car!"
and like that wasn't creepy enough, namjoon just whispered in her ear, "don't worry. he does that all the time. its totally normal. he means well, just doesn't know how kidnapperish it sounds."
jin tried to climb into the drivers seat, but due to namjoon's ironclad butt muscles crushing his balls, he could barely even walk.
a moment of silence for jin's future children.
rip.
yoongi shoved jin out of the way and claimed the responsibility of sitting in the driver seat.
he wouldn't actually drive, of course.
he put on his seatbelt and turned on the van, muttering something about tongue technology.
then he just put his foot on the pedal and took a nap. hoseok proceeded to have a heart attack, gripping the wheel from the passenger seat and steering the van as they sped out of the parking lot at 90 mph.
namjoon kept asking to stop because he broke his seatbelt and didn't want to die yet. but at this point the only way to stop would be to crash into a tree and that didn't seem safe.
despite their driver being unconscious and the other driver being on the verge of cardiac arrest, they made their way with confidence thanks to the emotional support and eternal knowledge of siri. by jungkook's request, her guidance led them straight through mcdonalds. as they crashed through the side of the building, the maknae's golden reflexes allowed him to grab four 10 piece chicken nuggets, nine cheese burgers, six medium fries, four completely empty cups, and twenty packets of ketchup, however he accidentally dropped eleven of the packets out the window to grab a packet of bbq sauce.
the sacrifice was worth it.
with that, they made their way to the interstate and began to pointlessly drive in whatever direction they were going. jiyoo thought they were going south because that's what her phones map said, but taehyung seemed fairly convinced they were going west because he saw a billboard with kanye on it.
and so the misfit group of refugees set out on what would become the adventure of a lifetime.
YOU ARE READING
aYo HiTmAn BaNg
Fanfictionher life was normal but she saw something she shouldn't have and now an assassin is after her and she must venture into the world on a journey with her seven crackhead neighbors
