Stupid Cupid: A Modern Clato Fanfiction [Completed]

Chapter 34

She wasn't happy. Everyone knew that. It just took her a bit longer to realize that. After all, the one person she could truly be herself with, the one person she trusted her entire existence with, was no longer there for her. Cato wasn't there, therefore Clove wasn't happy. 

It wasn't like her life was terrible. She was healthy and had food on her table everyday. She had two parents who loved her and always had her back. Clove had her other friends that listened to her and gave her advice when she needed it the most. But somehow, that wasn't enough. 

Cato filled that blank void in her life. he was her rock, her anchor. He was always there when she needed him. He never judged her, never forced her into something she didn't want to do. And above all, he understood her. That's why they were so close. They understood each other like no one else did. 

Clove didn't view herself as depressed. No, not at all. She didn't feel that she was weak, or not strong enough. She cut because she felt like she was worthless. Cato was the only guy she ever showed any interest in. It wasn't exactly the end of the world, but he was the only thing she needed in life. Without him, she felt lost. She felt cold and empty inside. 

The girl hated the fact that Cato loved Glimmer. Glimmer didn't deserve to have a guy as great as him. She felt that she would never be good enough in his eyes. Not anymore. If Cato didn't love her, than who would?

Clove didn't expect anyone to understand her methods. She didn't care, either. So when she felt like she was slipping away, she would go underneath her bed, and pull out her knives. A different blade for every emotion she was feeling on that particular day. 

She would feel the sting of a fresh wound and it would bring tears to her eyes, but she felt empty. The skin around the cut would turn red and swell up. Soon enough, thick blood was pooling up to the surface, smearing on the skin around it. 

First, it was the wrists. Then, that lead to her upper arms. Soon enough, Clove would strip down to her underwear and cut her thighs. She would stand in her bathroom, staring at her reflection. Her eyes looked dead. There was no light inside of them. She looked absolutely horrendous. 

Clove never thought she was pretty, but when she cut, she never felt beautiful. She felt like she was the ugliest person on the planet. And every day, when she would stare at herself in the mirror, she would scowl. Clove would shake her head, and in her head, she pointed out every single flaw she had. Every imperfection was brought to mind. And to Clove, there was a ton of them. 

Because she was heartbroken. 

***

Art class used to be Cato's favorite. He never let anyone know it, except Clove. He loved learning about the various ways to express his emotions, and he loved playing with the different tools and colors. It was something that made who he was, and he was a pretty good artist too. Not Peeta Mellark good, but still. 

Clove was in that class with him, and he found it hard to look at her. 

Cinna was their teacher. He didn't want them calling him by some fancy name, so they just stuck with calling him Cinna, 

"Good afternoon, students," Cinna said as he walked into the classroom. All conversation buzzed down, and students eagerly took their seats for the day's lesson. 

"Now, we will be starting our next project today, I want to see how far you've come in this class. So, I'm giving you the freedom to do whatever you want. Most choose a painting, but you may also utilize the yarn, clay, or anything else for that matter. Part of your grade will be how you express yourself through this piece. I don't want to just see repeats of the same old thing. I want you to use your creativity, and create something that reflects who you really are ad what you're feeling. Questions?" 

Glimmer's hand shot straight up. "Are we allowed to work in pairs?" she asked, tossing Cato a wink. He noticed Clove look over at the blonde girl and glare. If looks could kill, Glimmer would be dead. 

Cinna shook his head in response. "This is to be completed individually. Anything else?" 

Much to his amazement, Cato found himself nodding. "So you're saying that we can do whatever we want? No restrictions?" 

"That, Mr. Hadley," Cinna smiled. "Is exactly what I'm saying. I expect great things from you, young man. All of you. Now, get to work. We don't have all day." 

It suddenly dawned on Cato exactly what he was going to do. 

I saw Mockingjay for a second time today. Let me just say that it was just as good as the first. Jennifer Lawrence killed it when she sang The Hanging Tree. It took my soul.