Atelophobia || Graser10 // discontinued

2

We drove back home together while listening to music, not saying a word.

He finally broke the silence. "Babe?"

"Hmm?" I answered.

"Do you love me today?" He asked, going along with our daily routine.

"Come on Zach, you already know the answer to that..." I said quietly as I touched his arm while driving.

"I know... but please? Again?" His voice shook, I knew this scenario all too well.

I sighed. "Okay, baby... Look, I love you, forever and ever, and I'll never stop." I looked over to him. "You know that, right?"

He nodded and discreetly wiped a tear off his face.

We decided to go home and order pizza from there, because we were exhausted and just wanted to relax.

4 Hours Later

It was time to go to sleep, and as always, Zach was scared.

"What if..." he paused. "What if they come back?" He sat on the edge of the bed.

"The dreams? Babe, the dreams are nothing to be afraid of." I joined him, sitting on the bed also.

"I know, but... I'm scared." he scooted closer to me and held my arm.

"Zach," I turned to him and lightly touched his face. "I love you, and I'll be with you forever. If you start having the dreams again, I'll wake you up. Okay?"

He sighed. "Sagey, I really... really don't deserve you... You're so beautiful, and kind, and just amazing in every way possible. Your viewers love you, your friends love you, and so does everyone else." he scoffed. "Why do you want to be with me? I'm not anything special, that's for sure. I'm ugly, full of mental problems, and generally just goddamn stupid."

It broke my heart hearing this. It's the first time he's told me how he felt about it. I assumed it was because of the therapist meeting today, but... how could someone so amazing, so sweet, so... beautiful, think of himself this way?

"Baby..." I hugged him tight. "Look, I'm not perfect, and neither are you, and everyone else. What matters is that I love you, and nothing could ever change that." I leaned in slowly, and bit my lip. He pressed his soft lips against mine and pulled me closer. It was a deep, passionate kiss as I wrapped my arms around his neck and he wrapped his around my waist.

We slowly leaned out of it, going back to the state we were in before.

After a few minutes more of hugging, we laid down on the bed and turned off the light.

"Goodnight babe." he said after a long bit of silence.

"Goodnight Zach... I love you." I replied.

I felt my eyes get heavier and heavier, and fell into a light sleep, as I trained myself to do this, just in case Zach had a nightmare, like he did almost every night.

And sure enough, after 2 hours, he was at it again.

It usually started with him kicking the covers off, and fighting some invisible figure, but this time, it was just silent sobbing.

I sat up. "Zach? Babe? C'mon wake up." I shook him and he woke up slowly.

I sat him up and he was still crying.

I pulled him into an embrace and got closer to him. "I know honey..." I soothed him. "I know it hurts..." I rubbed his back and kissed his temple.

"I just- it's so-" he stopped in between words to sob.

"Shh... I know..." We laid back down on the bed, I was still holding him, and he was still crying. I comforted him until he stopped and fell asleep. It really did hurt to see him do this. Sometimes he would stop for a month straight- no nightmares whatsoever. But other times he would do this for a whole week non-stop.

I hoped that the therapy session would've helped, but it just seemed like it was getting worse.