Wei was trembling now, he was not looking forward to saying those words out loud, but Yunlan had a right to know.
Wei wanted to give him that right because he wanted him in his life.
"I... when I was little I felt a bit... lonely I guess, between work and my hyperactive brother my parents didn't have much time for me; my neighbour was an older kid and he sort of became my idol, I was always around him and when we became friends I didn't need anyone else, I had his attention and his support and that was all I wanted, I didn't need other friends... but then he left. He followed his family when they moved away, he thought I was old enough to hold my own but without him, I crumbled."
Yunlan listened without a word, that had to be the Chu he often talked about.
Wei kept his eyes lowered, he was shaking so much that his words came out with difficulty."Chu believed in me and gave me strength, but when he went away I was like a tree without roots. Yezun had never stopped trying to get my attention and I loved him, but there was a voice inside me telling me that his praises didn't really count because he was my little brother, he wasn't objective. That's stupid, I know, but I couldn't help it."
Yunlan kept silent, not knowing what to say because to him it did sound rather silly. Wei had busy but loving parents, and a brother that looked up to him, that would have been more than enough for Yunlan. In fact, he himself only had his parents but no siblings, but had never felt lonely or lost.
"I was always on my own and didn't really have friends, until one day I caught the eye of the wrong person. Feng was handsome but not really my type". Wei smiled sadly, remembering a face so different from Yunlan's. "I wouldn't have thought twice about him if he didn't come after me. It was the first time a guy showed such an interest in me and I... " Wei pondered on the right words, but there was really no other way he could say it. "He left his girlfriend, made me think that I was special, and I believed him. I needed so much to believe him..."
Wei felt like he couldn't breathe, it all sounded so stupid and he felt so embarrassed showing Yunlan how weak he had always been, but he couldn't stop now.
"He was my first but... it didn't really go well... I didn't know much about it but I thought it was supposed to feel good... I only felt pain... for a whole day I didn't exit my room, I should have stopped thinking about him but I couldn't, I was... obsessed with the idea of us together, I had believed all his words and I thought he loved me, that I meant something because he loved me... and when shortly after he went back to BeiBei and they got back together I lost my mind, I went to ask her to leave him to me."
Yunlan kept listening without comments, Wei ruffled his own hair and gave a sad, sarcastic laugh. "I was out of my mind, she yelled at me that I was sick and had to stay away from her boyfriend. I locked myself in my room for days, until I finally told my brother everything. I shouldn't have, he was only 15, but he had become my only friend, my shield. He didn't understand why I kept defending Feng, he couldn't forgive him for hurting me and he told his best friend."
After a moment of silence, Wei went on. "Jiu wasn't the ally my brother thought he was. He hated me and took this chance to turn the whole town against me. BeiBei had told no-one why she hated me, but Jiu made up a story of his own. He said that I lied to her in order to separate them, that I tried to seduce Feng but failed, that I was wicked, twisted, a deranged person that almost ruined two innocent lives..."
Yunlan was really trying to understand, but to someone like him it all seemed nothing more than bad gossip, so he said, "But it wasn't true, it was just his word against yours, why would they believe him over you?"
"There was no confrontation, I didn't defend myself, I became depressed and talked to no-one, barely ate anything for months, barely spoke a word, I became the shadow of myself until my mother suggested that a change might do me good and sent me here with a letter asking Mr. Chen to give me a job."
YOU ARE READING
What Happens In Rome.... [Lgbt] [✔]
RomanceAt first glance Wei appears to be the most composed, calm man you can think of, but inside he's shaken by an anxiety that constantly chokes him. Trying to understand him Yunlan will find out how his depression and lack of self-esteem almost ruined...