Ant & Dec short comedy fanfic (MUST READ)

Criminal mastermind

I climbed over the fence. I felt guilty. I hope Dec won't mind footprints on his fences.

I tiptoed in his front garden, wishing that the press isn't here to take photos and write articles about me, with the header "Criminal master Anthony David McPartlin broke into his best friend's house just to get a shirt."

When I was living near him, only a few blocks away, he gave me a key to his house. "Just take it" - he said "And don't knock on my door when you forgot the key in your house. Isla has been woken up about 13 times because of you knocking too hard on our door."

I tried to open the door with the key, but for some reason I can't

"Oh damn. He changed the lock." - I muttered.

He IS a bit overprotective.

I spotted an open window. The only way is to climb up the drainpipe. I took the 12th deep breath.

I'm not scared of heights, but I'm scared of spiders. What if they are up there?

And what if I'm too heavy for the drainpipe?

I'm gonna give it a try anyway.

I started climbing up. The drainpipe clearly doesn't want that much weight on it.

I climbed up... to the first floor.

The window is on second floor. I'm not giving up. Unless...

THERE'S A SPIDER. A BLACK AND YELLOW ONE. IT'S ON MY LEFT FOOT.

I tried very hard not to scream.

I think it's poisonous.

I don't think it is.

I think it is.

I started climbing faster.

'NO, IT'S FOLLOWING ME. GET OFF YOU ANIMAL! Oh wait, it's an arachnid. GET OFF YOU ARACHNID.' -I whispered.

*Yes, spiders aren't insect. They're arachnids, which is the type of insects that have eight legs, and no antennae. See? You really do learn something new every day. Anyway,

I climbed faster than ever. I looked down, the spider is gone.

But there's another problem...

You're probably thinking "Oh it's just another dumb spider"

No it's not, this one is far more worse.

I'm climbed too fast, now I'm on the third floor.

Unbelievable.

Yeah I think Stephen won't mind me using his catchphrase.