Unsavable

.Prologue.

⚠️Trigger warning⚠️
...

Every second an infinite unimaginable number of events take place. The world never rests. It is chaotic.

Billions of people reside on this planet fighting each day for survival. Humans are afraid of death. They are afraid of the unknown. Death is the unknown. No one really knows if there really is another place we go to after death. Is there really an after life? Or perhaps are we immediately reincarnated once we pass through the light at the end of the tunnel? Maybe we just ultimately cease to exist all together. Who actually knows?

Scientists spend countless long harsh hours coming up with new cures and remedies to cure any diseases, illnesses or injuries that may cause death or threaten the existence of mankind. Is it because of this fear?

I wonder...

I stand on the roof top of a skyscraper gazing out on the busy restless city below me. It's dark out but the stars are hidden by the endless amount of light pollution that the city emits.

I feel disappointed at this for some reason I wish that I could see them knowing full well that this isn't the right place. I take a deep breath in of unclean city air.

It's cold up here. Autumn is coming to an end and the first snow is expected to fall any day now. The icy wind smacks me in the face, stinging my cheeks and causing my nose to redden significantly further.

I check my watch, pulling my scarf over my cheeks, nose and mouth in the process.

One minute to midnight.

It's nearly time.

I look around like I am expecting someone to come out and stop me but there is not a soul present. It's just me.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I knew that this would be the case anyways.

I step forward and up onto the ledge. I look down at the busy street below.

All it is going to take is one jump then I will finally be free. From this height I doubt I will feel any pain, I will be dead as soon as I hit the ground.

I turn around, I do not wish to face the ground when I fall.

Unsurprisingly a lot of people have basophobia which is the fear of falling from a high place and is often confused with acrophobia which is the extreme fear of heights in general.

I too had my fears, I did have a mild form of basophobia and a few others... But I guess once you turn numb, fears and phobias don't affect you as much as they used to.

I check my watch one last time.

00:00

This is it. I lean back.

It felt like I was floating. My hair was flowing past my face is a crazed frenzy. I did not mind. My scarf came loose and flew away. I couldn't hear much other than the air whipping past my ears and my vision blurred as I unfocussed it from the world.

I felt peace, I felt free.

For the first time in a long time, a real smile crossed my lips.

"NOOO!!"