Am I selfish?

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Why does it hurt now?
This is what I wanted right?
To getaway.
To leave him.
So that I can have peace
Then why?
Why does it hurt?

I don't want these tears to flow.
I don't want to fall weak.
Please explain to me what is this.
Is this what it feels to have a heartbroken?
This is what I wanted, right?
Then why?
Why does it hurt?

I am sorry to hurt you.
I am sorry to hurt everyone.
What was my mistake I don't get it?
Was I too young?
Or was I too immature?
Please make this hurt stop
Please.

I never wanted to leave,
But I had to.
Don't you get it?
I had no choice?
Then why?
Why did you blame me?

Why?

Never in my life
Had I ever fall in love
But is this love?

Maybe it wasn't love
Maybe it was just an infatuation
I miss him even now
But now I have realized
I miss what we had
More than him.

I miss that comfort
I miss that belongingness
I miss that safety
I miss that feeling

I don't have that anymore
And it hurts
But now,
I don't miss you

Maybe in future
I'll have someone
A perfect someone
A perfect puzzle

Call me selfish
But I am growing

-Stutee

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