Journals

Journal 10: 3-7-15

Hey guys

It's been a while since i updated...

A lot has happened in my life that i should probably talk about.

Some of this stuff is personal, so no hate.

So. Last month, i got dumped. Although, our relationship was doomed from the start. I shall not name any names, but a month before our relationship ended, he started talking to/dating another girl. I am not sure which because it is all hearsay. Anyway, i didn't find out until after our relationship ended.

Obviously, being the naive girl i am, i was trying to make things work between us. The next day, i saw him kissing the girl right in front of me at school.

He was well aware that i was there, yet he didn't take into consideration, my feelings toward his actions.

I made some decisions that i am not very proud of. One of which, was sleeping with him...twice.

Another, was confronting the girl about his mistakes. (She took it as though i wanted to fight her, which i didn't.)

Then she wanted to fight me. (This situation is over, but i still get comments from classmates that i should beat her ass.)

I walked to his house last week to get my belongings back and asked him what was he thinking, why did he lie to me, et cetera. (I also have some of his things, but he will never get them back (: revenge sucks, doesn't it? Oh, and i called him an asshole, several times.)

Before anyone says anything, no, i am not keeping his things for me to remind myself of him. I am keeping them because they are rightfully mine now.

Bottom line, i knew it wouldn't last and i am much happier without him. I have too much self respect to go back to him, ever. And i deserve to be happy after all of the things he's done to make me feel like shit.

Thats the end of this journal...and i'll try to keep up with these. Obviously, they won't be "everyday" journals, but maybe once a week.

Ilyasm

~maddi:*