First Choice (Sam Wilkinson/Nash Grier)

Chapter 54

The rest of my Sunday was spent finishing my bag of cheddar cheese and sour cream ruffles while I watched a series of romantic comedies and wallowed in self pity.
Nash was going to be gone for a while and things between Sam and I were anything but okay right now, so I would basically be spending the next few weeks looking for ways to occupy my time and finding ways to still hang out with my friends when Sam wasn't around. Avoiding Sam wasn't exactly the most mature way to handle this situation but he basically embarrassed me in front of the whole school and he of all people knew how that must have made me feel considering my anxiety issues.
He hadn't even tried to apologize and Sarah had made it pretty clear before that he didn't want me around anyways. I wasn't sure if I believed her one hundred percent because it was possible that she was just a psychotic jealous bitch but if she was telling the truth and I ignored it and continued to put up with Sam, I would look like such an idiot to everyone.
It hurt that Sam and I used to be so inseparable and now we hadn't spoken for almost a week straight. All this space between us was only increasing every moment we spent avoiding the other and never actually dealing with our problems, but I didn't know how to stop it or go about fixing them.
Monday morning was rainy and freezing, me shoving my glove covered hands into my jacket as I walked to school. It was the first time I'd done it in a while, but I wasn't speaking to Sam and Nash wasn't here so I had to do what I had to do to get through it. Besides, I could use the extra exercise.
I'd been careful to avoid any puddles but the tips of my vans were still soaked, my toes freezing as I continued walking. The rain was any girls worst enemy, and I was glad that I tied my hair up in a tight bun and wore the hood of my coat to add an extra covering besides my umbrella. I wasn't about to be sporting an Afro all day long.
Even though the rain ruined my shoes, messed up my hair, soaked my clothes, and chilled me to the bone, I still loved rainy days. They were such a dark contrast to the bright sunny days that everyone else seemed to love. I've always liked rainy days better than any other kind. Who didn't love curling up in your bed under a warm comforter and taking a nap while the sound of the soft patter of the rain outside your window relaxed you.
My thoughts were interrupted as a car pulled up, me turning to thankfully find Jack's car rather than Sam's. The window rolled down and I spotted Elizabeth's perfectly curled brown hair first. She was so pretty and she always did her best to look amazing at all times.
"Jasmine? What are you doing walking in this rain? Aren't you freezing?" She shouted, waving me over to her. My teeth chattered as I approached the car and considered my options. I could either end up in an awkward explanation of how Sam and I hadn't worked things out so I was left ride-less, or I could spend the next ten minutes continuing my walk to school in the freezing rain.
I decided to go with the first choice as Gilinsky told me to "Get in the car before you die of hypothermia!" And I did as told. I rubbed my hands together, the warm air in the car warming me drastically, though I still couldn't feel my toes,the tips of my fingers, or my nose.
"Where's Sam and why aren't you riding with him?"
Here comes the third degree from older brother Gilinsky. He was so protective and he knew just how much of a dick-head Sam could be at times.
"We haven't really, well... we aren't really talking so I didn't want to ask him."
He nodded, not looking to happy about the news as him and Elizabeth shared and glance, but he didn't poke at it any further.
"And Nash? What kind of boyfriend makes his girlfriend walk?" He asked, reaching over and placing his hand over Elizabeth's on the arm rest. I looked away from the intimate way he intertwined his fingers with hers, feeling as if I was imposing.
"He went back to North Carolina to visit his Mom and little sister for a few weeks."
"Oh, well that's good for him I guess." He looked like he had much more to say on the subject but again, Gilinsky wasn't one for drama and was always careful not to say anything that would create any.
"Why didn't you text one of us? You know we would have gave you a ride." Elizabeth asked, it seemed as if I was getting lectured by my parents rather than having a conversation with my friends.
"Okay Mom." I rolled my eyes and Gilinsky chuckled, Elizabeth whacking his arm.
"Hey! I just don't want you to have to walk alone in that horrible weather." She said.
I hated how everyone was always trying to look after me, as if I couldn't handle myself. I only felt helpless half the time because they treated me as if I was. I could handle myself and I was growing tired of having my friends lecture on what I should and shouldn't do, regardless of if they were just looking out for me.
"It's fine, it's not really that cold anyways." I muttered, leaning my head against the cool window.
The rest of the ride was spent in silence, Gilinsky turning up the radio. When we got to the school, Gilinsky dropped Elizabeth and I off at the walkway to the doors and went to park the car. She wanted to wait for Jack before going inside so I went ahead and headed into the school.
I walked to the bathroom, anxious to see how my hair was holding up. A few hairs had escaped the hold of the hair tie and curled from the moisture but it wasn't that bad, me reassuring myself with the memory of Nash telling me he loved it when my hair did this. It did look sort of cute, a messy bun with a few curls framing my face. I just smoothed down a few places and headed over to the cafeteria.
My shoes made this squishy noise as I walked but I'd just have to deal with it until second period and then I'd change into the dry pair of Vans in my gym locker.
I took a seat, careful to sit as far away from Sam on the other side of the table.
"Hey Jasmine." Johnson smiled at me, scooting a little to make room for me. I returned his smile and slid my bag off of my shoulder and onto the floor behind us.
"Where's Nash?" He asked. It was clear that Nash and him had grown close, him being the only one to ask. Everyone looked over at me as I answered.
"He's in North Carolina visiting his family."
"Oh, for how long?" Aaron asked, and I noticed the way Sam was suddenly staring at me intently.
"Um, three and a half weeks."
"Wow, that's pretty long but I'm sure he'll be back before you know it." Johnson said, nudging my shoulder with his.
"Yeah, I hope so." I mumbled, looking down. I rubbed my hands together, they still felt a bit cold.
Sam and I had been avoiding each other and he hasn't been at the table in the mornings all last week so I don't understand why he was here now staring at me.
"Oh yeah, my friend Shawn has got this Christmas ball thing and I was wondering if you guys all wanted to come. It's Saturday around noon but I think it will be a lot of fun." I told them, hoping that they would be able to go. I'd feel so horrible if I let Shawn down.
My prayers were answered as they all said that they would be able to besides Matthew because he had to go to a conference with his dad that afternoon.
"I can't go either, I've got important shit to do." I heard Sarah say from the other end of the table. I didn't want that bitch to go anyways but I had a feeling that she was just doing this to be rude.
"Okay, and?" I muttered sarcastically, her rolling her eyes and grinning as she leaned her head on Sam's shoulders.
"Well it's sort of a ball, or a dance, so I guess you won't be able to go either." I tell Sam. He doesn't say anything, just nodding but I noticed the way he shrugged Sarah off and clenched his jaw.
"What about you? Nash isn't here so you don't have a date either." Sarah pointed out. She was right, but the truth was that I just didn't want Sam to come which is why I had said that. It would have just made things awkward and I wanted to be focused on supporting Shawn, not avoiding Sam the whole time.
"I'll be her date," Johnson said as he turned and looked at me, "I mean if it's alright with you."
I smiled and nodded, silently thanking him for saving me.
Sam scoffed and snaked his arm around Sarah's waist, pulling her close.
Petty, so damn petty. Was he honestly getting jealous of Johnson of all people right now and trying to get back at me by suddenly being all over Sarah when I'd just seen him shrug her off no more than three seconds ago.
"Don't forget it's a formal type of thing so that means suits and and formal dresses, plus it's kind of Christmas themed so red and green accessories would be a good idea."
I was relieved that Sarah and Sam weren't going but it was still upsetting that Sam and I weren't on better terms or else he could have. It's not like I wanted Sarah there but I'd sort of hoped that Sam would have made a bigger effort to at least try and come rather than just giving up. He wouldn't have come without Sarah anyways, my conscience reminded me. It was true, when was the last time that he did something just for me because he knew it was important to me without having some sort of other motive than just trying to show me he cared, he only ever did things like that when someone told him to or when he was just trying to make me not be angry at him anymore. He only thought of himself, and what was the point anyways. I was the one who had told him he couldn't come, so who was I to expect him to try to. I was being stupid, but I still remained upset about it for the rest of the day.
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Happy thanksgiving loves!! Have an awesome day and eat turkey. Sit on your ass and pig out because you deserve it!
Thank you for all the reads, votes, and comments.

As always,
Alyssa.