Chapter Thirty Two

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The next night Benny dropped her off in front of the stone building she had been avoiding for a month.  She saw Niall leaning against the wall, waiting for her. 

"Please, Edie go back to what was wor---" She didn't hear the rest as she slammed the door.

Niall only looked up at her as he pushed himself off the wall.  She walked right past him and up the stairs.  She could feel him behind her.

She chose a seat that already had two people on either side of her so that he couldn't sit next to her.  She pulled the sleeves of her sweater down so that she was holding both ends in her hands as she crossed her arms tightly across her chest.

Charlie sat down, "Edie," she started, a little surprised.  "It's good to see you.  I hope your brother is doing well.  How are you?"

"It's an 'I want to fake my own death, move to Mexico, and live off tacos and tequila' kind of day," she said, as sarcastically as she could.

She heard someone stifle a laugh.  "Is there anything you'd like to talk about?" Charlie asked.

"Not a thing."

Charlie didn't say any more to her.  The first half of the meeting went as it always did, even more so since she was back to square one, not wanting a thing to do with any of them.  Without looking, she knew Niall was looking at her.  But she refused to look his way.  She refused to give in.

At the break, she ran down the stairs and out into the fresh August air.  She could sense Autumn was coming back to London.  The nights were cooler.  She usually loved this time of year.  Then again, she used to love a lot of things.

She took several deep breaths as she stood there, hopefully out of sight of a certain someone.  No luck.  "Edie?" came a soft Irish voice.

'Fuck,' she mentally cursed.  She opened her eyes to see him standing in front of her.  "Leave me the fuck alone, Niall."

"I understand you're mad at me.  Although, to be honest, I don't know why.  I don't know what I did.  But whatever it is, I want to say that I'm sorry."

"How can you be sorry for something when you don't even know what to be sorry for?" She harshly spat out at him.

He just shrugged.  "I want you to know that I didn't feel comfortable being in your house last night.  I didn't like being there without you knowing.  It felt like I was violating your privacy."

"And yet, you showed up anyway and hung out there for however long with my brother who you supposedly ran into on the street."

"Yeah, I did.  I just wanted to make sure you were okay.  Make sure you were alive."

"Well, I'm alive.  Now can you leave me the fuck alone." She looked him straight in the eye when she said that and it took everything in her to not run in for a hug.  Instead, she stepped past him as she made her back into the meeting.

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The next several weeks went by with Edie not speaking to Niall.  She showed up to all the meetings now since her brother dropped her off and he was making sure she went in.  He and her brother had started talking to each other after every meeting.  Niall never had anything new to report - she sat there, not looking at anyone, refusing to talk.

He continued to work her "case" but never got anywhere with it.  He even had tried to find other, similar rape cases with no luck.  It was like the guy just randomly decided to rape someone and then never again.  And he found that hard to believe.

What he also found discouraging was that he still wasn't sleeping and his obsession with his own scars had formally taken up residence in his mind again.  He hadn't said much in these meetings the last few weeks, having been so concentrated on her.  He was concerned that having found his shooter, it still meant his mind wasn't at rest.  He kept shaking it off that he was just worried for her more than anything and that that was what was bringing this all back.

He had decided after the meeting that night that he would go back to where she had been found and see if anything would come to him.  He even had decided he was going to tell Edie what he was doing and see if she was interested.  Of course, she had to let him talk to her first.

He sat in his now usual seat across from her, watching her.  She had been wearing long sleeved shirts for weeks and couldn't understand why.  It had been unusually hot during the days, despite it cooling at night, he still wore t-shirts and shorts.

At the break, he followed her outside.  "Edie, please wait up.  I have something I want to discuss with you.  Please?"

She stopped but kept herself turned from him.  That almost suited him since lately her eyes had nothing but contempt for him and he didn't know why.  At times, he thought for sure she was putting on an act but she never seemed to relent enough for him to know for sure.  She did nothing.  She said nothing. 

"Well, what is it?" she snapped after several minutes, still not looking at him.

"I wanted to tell you that I've been trying to find a lead on your case and that I've been retracing your steps off of what I remem--"

She whirled around to face him, "You're doing what?"

"I promised you I'd help."

"So you're going there? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Nothing.  I just want to help you!"

She stepped toward him and for the first time in almost two months, he felt her breath on him as she whispered, "Stay away from that place.  It's nothing but the ninth level of hell."

She walked past him, her arm brushing against his, sending a chill up his spine.  He couldn't tell if it was the good kind or the bad kind.

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