- - - - lost stories from quartzia - - - -

alone, part 2

(jahseh onfroy)
my thoughts are time consuming
i could be getting things done, i could be successful today, but here i am, smoking weed and drinking to get rid of my problems and letting my anger get to the best of me.

today was one of those days.

i headed out through the doors of the bar with a large bottle of whiskey in my hand.

i wanted to murder geneva for fucking with me tonight.

i stumbled across the road which was covered in broken glass and spilled alcohol, as expected. it was no surprise at all.

in my drunken state, i ended up finding my way to an alley near the bar, and i came across an elderly man walking nearby.

he was probably on his way to take a piss, not that it bothered me.

but then, the angry urge suddenly hit me, and i advanced towards the man, pushing him roughly up against the wall, my hand was secured tightly around his neck and i loved the way he struggled to breathe and how much he was trying to tell us to stop.

i pulled him towards me, hand still around his neck, before bashing his head heavily against the dirty, cracked wall.

he was a crying mess, his neck and head already dripping with fresh blood.

i let go of his neck, and i smirked to myself as i watched his body collapse to the ground

but no, i wasn't done yet...
i contemplated what i was going to do with his blood-covered body, and i decided to go with the first thing that went through my mind:

i was going to kick his chest hard enough for him to jolt up, step on his ribs till he starts coughing blood, then i'd leave him to lie there in the maze of old tires and broken metal till he gains consciousness again.

so that's what i did.

i took a deep breath in. 'i'm not a psychopath', i told myself, as i lifted my leg up, then forced it down onto his chest.

he coughed loudly, it was a smoker's cough, you could hear it from how scratchy and dry it sounded, until the blood followed, and i continued my unfair assault on the old man under my foot with no emotion displayed across my face.

it's wasn't the first time i did something like this anyways.

eventually, his coughing stopped and so did his struggling. that was my indication to leave him alone for now, so i stepped off of him, spat on his face for extra measure, then walked out of the alley, tripping over the pieces of debris laying around the area.

i'm on my way home to my 'girlfriend'
and i'm gonna teach her a good lesson tonight