Life Of A Single Mom

Chapter 10

I never got a response from either one of them that first day.
So of course my mind started spiraling.
Maybe they were trying to process everything the same way I was… Or maybe they truly just didn’t give a damn anymore.
I mean, I had left Will after everything we went through, and me and John had only slept together once after he got out before I disappeared again. So part of me felt like maybe this was karma finally catching up to me.
The next day, Will finally texted back.
Surprisingly… he was excited.
But after our little pregnancy scare with Ebony, he wanted me to take another test in front of him just so he could see it for himself. Honestly, I couldn’t even be mad at that. Trust between us had already been shaky.
We agreed to meet up later that day to talk.
The entire drive there, I felt embarrassed and ashamed. My stomach was in knots thinking about facing him. But the moment I saw him, there he was standing outside smiling like none of that mattered.
He hugged me. Checked on me. Acted genuinely happy to see me.
And somehow that made me feel even worse.
We sat and talked for a while before I finally went to the bathroom to take the test again.
Two minutes later…
Positive.
Again.
At that point, reality started settling in deeper than before.
I was really pregnant.
Pregnant with my fourth child.
All I could think was, Lord, what am I supposed to do with four kids running around calling me mama?
But despite the shock, Will stayed calm about everything. We agreed that when I had my first doctor’s appointment, I’d let him know so he could come with me.
And honestly, that gave me a little comfort.
At least I didn’t feel completely alone anymore.
About a week later, John finally decided to respond.
Now if you knew John, you knew he always took forever replying to anything. So when his message finally came through, I opened it expecting attitude… but not what I actually read.
“It’s not mine. So why you telling me? We didn’t fuck.”
I stared at that text for at least five minutes straight.
Confused. Angry. Hurt.
Because what did he mean we didn’t?
Could he seriously sit there and pretend it never happened?
One thing about me — I always kept track of who I dealt with. Dates, times, places… all of it. So there was no confusion on my end.
And honestly, his response crushed me more than I expected.
Not because I needed him to claim the baby right then… but because of how cold he sounded.
Like I was some random woman trying to trap him instead of the mother of his child.
I wanted to argue back so bad. Wanted to send paragraphs. Wanted to remind him exactly what happened that night.
But I didn’t have the energy.
Between the stress, the pregnancy hormones, and the medication the doctor had me taking, I was already exhausted physically and mentally.
So instead, I put my phone down and stayed quiet.
That night I laid in bed crying harder than I had in a long time.
The only thing running through my mind was:
This can’t really be my life.
Why me? Why this situation? Why now?
I just wanted answers.
But the way I was raised, you never questioned God even when life didn’t make sense. You trusted that somehow there was purpose behind the pain, even when you couldn’t see it yet.
And at that moment…
faith was the only thing keeping me together.