Snakes and Crepes (Ineffable Husbands)

Mice

It began with a garden, and it shall end with a garden.

I was awoken in my bedroom by a mouse with beady red eyes and a grime-covered coat. It sat upon my chest, staring a hole into me. Its nose twitched as it sniffed me for a moment before sneezing in disgust. I wasn't afraid of it, but I could tell he was sent from hell. The way he reacted to the fact that I had a faint odor of a certain angel on me was obvious. "Who sent you?" I muttered to the mouse, causing it to frantically scatter away.

I tossed the covers off of me before getting out of bed. The cold floor against my feet caused me to shudder, but I tried my best to ignore the unpleasant cold and focus on the mouse. I chased after him. I was able to sense his presence which meant he was either heavenly or demonic.

Something smells different. I stuck the tip of my tongue out to get a better smell. I could only vaguely smell out of my nose in my human form. My tongue was much more effective.

I heard scattering behind me, and I turned around. "Come out!" I called out to the mouse, but I did not hear the mouse.  I began to check behind everything the rodent could possibly be hiding behind. The dark didn't bother me since I was so used to the dark nothingness of hell. It was almost easier to see in the dark rather than the light.

Nothing. The rodent got away, and I bet it left with whatever it was looking for. The only demon I know the used mice is— oh satan-god.

This is spooky. This is really spooky.

Corson is in higher ranks than Beelzebub. He is only meant to be disturbed on the rare, very important, no other options occasions. Why would one of his rats be down here?

Probably because I stopped Armageddon, and I killed Ligur. It could be because I'm in love with an angel or because I accidentally ate dirt that I thought was powdered cocoa. I can't taste the difference. Come to think of it, it could be a lot of reasons. I have a knack for doing the stupidest things when left to my own devices.

Who am I kidding? They wouldn't summon him for a demon in the lowest ranks such as myself. I take orders from the ninth circle of hell. I bet it's just a normal rat who thinks I smell gross. Maybe I just need to call an exterminator.

Now, I would call Aziraphale at the prime witching hour (three am) and tell him everything that just happened, but I didn't want to freak him out over something that could be nothing. Then again, this could be everything.

I had to think of someone who wouldn't rat me out to my lovely angel, but also they might be able to give me some mildly constructive advice. Newt.

I scrambled to get to my phone. I heard another patter of mouse feet behind me. I lashed around before hearing another clatter of small feet from the opposite side.

They were everywhere.

They started to move towards me, foam pouring from their small mouths. There had to be thirty-five or fifty. Frankly, I was too panicked to count. Their teeth were pointy, almost otherworldly, and their eyes were beady red or black. They slowly approached me with their hackles raised and a low hissing noise coming from them. I had done something horrible to offend them even if I wasn't sure what.

I was so consumed by fear at the moment that I was oblivious to the presence of Angel. "Let there be light," he called out, causing the rodents to scurry away and jump into the darkness. "Crowley, dear, are you okay?" He raced over to me, but I just turned and held myself in a hug.

"They said they'd leave us alone," I mumbled.

"Yes, yes, I know, but are you okay?"

"They said they'd leave us alone. I thought we'd finally be able to just be, but they tried to kill me with mice in the dead of night! I don't want to constantly be on guard. Hell and I had a deal," I snapped, frustrated by the fact that the rulers of hell went back on their deal even though anyone with half a brain could see it coming.

"Shh, shh, it's okay. I'm here. You're right. Hell went back on their deal and that was wrong of them," Angel said.

"Don't say that. They love being wrong. They treasure wrong-doings," I huffed. "It's literally their job."

Truthfully, I was scared. I was scared for myself and Angel. I could have just really been hurt, and it took a miracle that I wasn't.

"How did you know?" I asked.

"I— well—I didn't know," Angel paused. "But at the same time, I did. It was very strange. I shouldn't be able to sense distress. I should only sense love, and I certainly shouldn't be able to sense anything due to how far you were from me. It's been a new occurrence," he explained.

"New but helpful," I said as I recouped myself.

"Can you do anything new?" Aziraphale asked.

"No, it's just the same old me with the same old skill set," I said as I tried to sense any more demonic entities. "They've all left."

"I know," Aziraphale said.

"I don't think I'm going to sleep anymore tonight after that," I let out a small sigh, feeling a tad shaken.

"Me neither," Aziraphale agreed. "Not that I'm a fan of sleeping in the first place," he said. He practically never slept, unlike me. "How about I stay here, and we can just talk?"

"I'd like that..." I looked at the shadowy corners. "Let's... let's leave the lights on," I mumbled. My face felt naked without my glasses. Sure, Aziraphale had seen me without them before, but right now was different because he could see the fear in my eyes. He could see that something was wrong. "Do you think they'll come back?" I asked.

"I don't know, but I do know that I won't let any of them hurt you."