Habits (Larry)

17.

We called 911 immediately. Ambulances arrived immediately. I didn't know what to do about the whole situation, but I felt like I might faint. We rode to the hospital in silence, and I felt worry build blocks on top of me. I drove way past the speed limit. I ran millions of red lights. I didn't care though. We got to the hospital and raced in, demanding to see him. They yelled at us because we weren't family. I screamed and Niall put his hands on my shoulders and guided me to the waiting room so I could sit down and take a breath. I felt like my head was going to explode. Everything was happening so fast. It had occurred to me that Louis was really hurt, and it occurred to me that Louis might die. That just made me even more upset to think that the last time I spoke to Louis, I was an ass to him. Eventually, Jay came and told me I should go home. I yelled at her, and Liam had to hold me back. She tried to hug me, but I pushed her away.

I didn't leave.

The other boys left, but I refused. I glued my ass in the chair and just sat in dark silence, waiting. I felt so much shame bubble inside of me. What I had done at the bar, was such an immature move. Why had I done it? I had no idea. I thought about it as the days, which began to feel like centuries, ticked by. But then a few days later when us four boys were sitting in silence, Jay came to us and told us the scoop. He was alive and okay for now, but was very sick. We were now welcome to see him. My stomach ached at the thought of facing Louis when he probably wanted to stab me.

As usual, I let the other boys go first and that left Jay and me sitting there in an awkward silence. Finally, she took in a breath and said, "you know he really loves you Harry. He always told me about you and how great you were and how things were great. But then, when this Eleanor girl stepped in the picture, he just kind of crumbled, you know? I think he gets lost without you Harry, that's all. I don't know what happened that night, but I assure you he will be thrilled to see you today." For some reason, that brought tears to my eyes. Louis really did love me. I wiped them away casually and nodded. It was once again silent until the other boys came back and told me to go see him. My head spun as I walked to his room. I stood at the door, heart throbbing. I opened the door ever so quietly. I poked my head in, and looked in the direction of the hospital bed. I could just make out Louis hidden among the hospital bed sheet. He was laying face down against the bottom corner of the pillow. One of his too thin arms stretched out across his body. I gulped because I was guaranteed he was sleeping. So, I sat down in a chair not far from the bed and just waited for him to wake up. A lot of time passed by, I don't know how much though. Then, I heard a whimper and I glanced up to see Louis peering down at me. His eyes were twisted with confusion and sadness. It was painful to look at them, because they showed such Indescribable pain it made you cringe to look at them. I shook the thought away and just as soon as Louis appeared, he disappeared. I sat up so I could see the top of the hospital bed. There Louis lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling. He was twirling his thumbs, but as he did the iv in his left arm got stuck on the bed sheets and he would have to pull it out. He wouldn't acknowledge me. If anything, Louis looked nervous that I was even in his presence. I decided that if I was going to get Louis to speak, I would have to speak first.
"You know I love you."
"I know."
"You know I didn't mean anything I did that night. I admit it. I was a drunk, dumb shit and I don't know why I did it or what I was thinking, but it was really fucked up of me and I shouldn't have done that to you. I'm really sorry."

".....Harry, why are you apologizing? You were right Harry! Everything you said, you were damn truthful about. Everything you said made complete sense to me, and I helped me open my eyes more. If anything, I should be thanking you."

The statement made me feel nauseous. I was forced to choke down the vomit rising in my throat.

"Louis, no. None of those things i said were true, okay? None. I want you here Louis. Niall. Zayn, and Liam want you here. Your family wants you here. Your millions of fans want you here."

"But maybe I don't want to be here."

That made all my hopes sink. It hit me. Louis wanted to die. He wanted to die. He never wanted to be found in that bath tub. He wanted to die there. He didn't want to exist. I felt myself began to sob. I leaned forward and ran a hand through Louis' out of control hair. And for some reason, I kissed him. I don't know why, but he accepted the kiss and it felt so good.

"Louis, I love you okay? Please know that. No matter what the case, I love you."

"But what about...wha..what about Veronica?"

"Fuck Veronica. I never liked her. I'm an idiot. I'm so sorry."

"I love you too Harry," the sentence that escaped louis' lips made my heart race and made me feel starstruck, "but I just don't understand how you could love me. Harry, you deserve a forever. You deserve someone better."

"No Louis, I only ever want you. I love you so much okay?"

"Okay."

And that's when we kissed again and I melted into his kiss and it seemed to last forever.

I wish it did.

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Hi everyone! Yep another chapter is done, so I have news. First, I developed an ending to this fanfiction and I estimate there will only be a few more chapters. Also, I'm not sure you will at first like the ending, so just give me a chance to drag it out ok?