Endless Love

Chapter Twenty-Four

Grace's POV

Tension was so thick in the air, I swear I could have cut it with a knife.

My chest ached and tears rolled quickly out of my eyes and down my cheeks.

I could feel Holland wanting to say something to try and clear the air a little, but from the corner of my eye I knew that she was too scared to speak.

Mom and I had not broken eye contact, I was waiting for someone else to say something, and by the looks of it so were both of them.

Making out what I could from behind my tears, Mom's eyes didn't hold one ounce of remorse, I knew she hated me.

In the end Holland couldn't take it anymore.

"Grace go to your room"

For a minute I was scared to move, scared that Mom would shout something equally as ugly at me again, but as I started walking away, she remained silent.

I curled up on my bed and cried.

I was so sick of Mom and I always ending up in these nasty fights and situations, hating one another. We had never used to do that before I opened up about my issues – clearly she hated me because I was a fuck up.

This time felt different to every other time, she told me she didn't want me.

Thoughts ran through my head, ugly thoughts.

Each trail of thought would weave itself around my brain, but ultimately they all ended in the same place: maybe it was best to leave.

Mom didn't want me, she had never wanted me. She was forced to have me because someone forced themselves onto her. This baby inside of her now was the baby that she really wanted. She had chosen that baby. She was having that baby with someone who she really loved, not someone who raped her.

But even after everything, the thought of leaving home and leaving Mom broke my heart because even if she didn't love me, I would never stop loving her.

I cried some more and eventually passed out in exhaustion.

Sarah's POV

Hearing those words come out of her mouth elicited a response from me that will forever haunt me.

It was ugly and monstrous.

Even after every single thing that I had been through with Grace, there had never been a moment in my life that I had regretted choosing to keep her.

Telling her that I had never wanted her was a lie, it was a horrible, disgusting lie that made me sick to my stomach.

As soon as those words left my mouth, I knew that I had stabbed her through the heart and completely lost her trust.

I wasn't mad at her in the slightest. I wasn't mad that she was drunk, or invited her friends into our home without telling me, I wasn't mad that she had lied, I wasn't mad that she said she didn't want me to be her mother. I was only mad at myself.

I cried to Holland and she held me, but she felt tense, almost like she despised me for what I said

"Do you think I'm the worst person in the world?" I asked

"I think you have a lot to think about and a lot to apologize for" was her only answer

I had never felt more like a child until that moment.

I was frightened and alone and I felt like nobody in this moment had an inch of love to give, understandably.

I pulled away from Holland and wiped the tears from my eyes and then rested my hands on my belly, hoping that this baby would love me and that I could be a proper mother.