The Puppeteer part 2 (cut and repost)

The Puppeteer - He is sick

When I was younger all I felt was fear. My whole life was filled with fear of getting hurt, yelled, beaten. I beg, cry, live, sleep in nothing but fear

As I grew up all I felt was sadness and emptiness. My world felt so dark,  so dreamy. There's no escape in my slavery fatal fate. I always felt like a mistake, everything I did never seems to be right, everyone hates me and hurts me.. Even my parents

But now all I feel are anger.  A bolted up anger that is hard for me to contained.  I came to this realization after I lived with Connel's family. I always thought everything that has been done to me was normal and I deserved it. But they proof it wrong.  They thought me how children was supposed to be treated and they concerned about me.  I was an idiot for being a living corpse in their house,  I gave them so much trouble.. And yet.. And yet..  They never hurt me.  They even accept me as a family

And William killed them..

They are my savior,  they make me human instead of zombie

Now here I am eating maggots to feed my starvation. Roaches,  grasshoppers, crickets anything that moves. That's the good thing about living in this house,  no matter how I clean it there will be maggots and insects everywhere since we live in the middle of places with trees..  I don't know what it's called.  But I enjoy climbing trees for fruits

In the middle of my meal I heard William's footsteps coming,  I lowered my head when he open the door and step in, his boots was the first thing landed on my face, I almost fall to my side but he catch my hair.  I know this is coming but I would never know the reason..  William could be so unreasonable,  I couldn't understand him

.. Why are you beating me this time..?

"You son of a bitch.. Why did you keep giving me trouble! Don't you had enough lying about me huh!!? "

I look at his face with my dead eyes,  when did I ever lie about you..?

A punch reach my face,  then another.  I could already felt blood running down my nose

"You think you're that good huh? You think you're the boss, asshole??!!" He kick me on my neck and I was sent crushing to the floor behind. I cough,   I couldn't recover from his assaults,  he started to let out kicks forcing me to curl into myself, I tried my best not to scream,  I have been trained that way for years,  but my lips are trembling..  I am scared of him,  scared of how much he will hurt me,  scared of what he will do to me

"How's that feels like huh?  Do you like it!!??  How does it feels when someone is looking down at you you piece of shit!!!?"

I accidentally scream when he kick my lower part.  I have done the biggest mistakes in my life. Once I show my weakness to William,  he will repeatedly hit me on the same spot until I became quiet. 

"What's wrong now you motherfucker!!?  Can't take the pain??  Being such a little pussy!!??"

I scream several times in pain,  I couldn't take it anymore..  Please be over soon

.. It will be over soon..

.. It will be over soon..

I shut my eyes and I tried to be deaf from his yelling, trying my best to hold the pain he caused on me..  For years now this body has been crushed for so many times. All my bruises from previous beatings are still swollen.. And this won't make it any better

"Look at me now you slut!  Why did you ever did this to me??!!  Answer me you maggots!!" He lift me up and press me to the wall.

"Answer me or I'll crush that stupid jaw of yours with my fist!!"

.. How can I answer you when I didn't know the answer master.. ?

"Hey!!  I'm talking to you bastard!!"

.. I don't know what are you even talking about master..

I open my lids slowly and look at his face above me. I was covered by his shadows and at that moment..  I saw something I never did before.. In William's eyes I saw a reflection of myself..  He got that eyes .. That emerald eyes of mine. I could tell he is in shock and fears as much as I did. My lips parted I wanted to say something.. there's so many things filled my head all of sudden.. And I couldn't decide which to pick...

"Why..? " is the only thing that slipped out my mouth. And those eyes of him suddenly turns dark again,  he frowned and raise his fist

"You goddamn bitch!!"

One.. Two.. Three..

I spit out blood in my mouth,  I could feel the blood from my nose and lips flowing down my chin.

"You wanna look down on me??!  You are nothing but a mistake as well!!!"

That's not me master..that's not me..

He kneel my stomach until blood splattered out my mouth.  The pain.. The pain is too much..

"You cunt!!  such a goddamn mistake!! What does talking bullshit about me makes you feel so good huh!!??"

In the brink of that moment..  Flashes came into my mind when My conscious are drifting away.. His yelling echoed,  my pain felt numb.. images in my memory flashes

One of it is the memory of miss J telling me 'William loves you' 'you should think about him' 'William want someone to care of' 'He couldn't let you go'

'William is sick'

My eyes are wide open again.

He could be really sick,  and at this moment.. he thought I am someone else.. 

"It's not me.. " I gasp. And William paused,  he frowned deeper as he stares at me with those sadistic eyes.

"What did you just say..? "

"It's not me.. Master.. I didn't say any bad thing about you.. " I speak between my trembling lips and sharp gasp

He look at me for a second "you liar.. "

My heart stop.