You Know, I've Always Loved You

'Do you feel loved?'

D-do I look cute? Tine asked himself for about the fortieth time today, as he ran his hands over his olive green button up as if to try and flatten wrinkles despite his most likely having already fixed any wrinkles that were present during of the first twenty times he nervously messed with the fabric. However, he still continued to fidget with his clothes with every passing second, adjusting his black jean jacket, untucking and retucking his shirt into his jeans, and loosening and tightening his belt. Tine knew he didn't look bad. The outfit that he was currently wearing was one of his favorites, but the real question was would Sarawat like it. Would Sarawat find it cute? Would Sarawat find Tine cute? Those were questions that swirled in Tine's head as he impatiently waited for the musician to arrive. Unfortunately for Tine, he had to wait a bit. He had arrived to the park about thirty minutes early, and was now pacing anxiously in a circle as he continued to mess with his clothes. He might as well have been wearing a giant pin that read I'm nervous as hell as any passer-by could realize that the well-dressed yet frantic man was even beginning to wear throw the grass. If someone were to walk by after Tine had left, there would be a perfect circle near the bank of the river where no grass could grow as it had all been torn up by anxious feet.

Tine checked his phone as if it had become a nervous tick, clicking on the screen every few seconds to check the time or to see if he got a text from the man he was waiting for. With every check he got more anxious, noticing how his date with Sarawat was getting closer and closer. Soon it will be time, he thought, and Sarawat will be here. He continued to fidget as his nerves continued to build up at the thought of his date actually happening. Tine was beyond nervous. He knew he was, but he didn't necessarily know why. Maybe it's because its a surprise. I have no idea what Sarawat has prepared. Tine's eyes darted from left to right as if to check and see that no tall, well built man by the name of Sarawat was sneaking up on him. When he noticed no such event, he sighed. Come on, Tine, he criticized himself. You're being paranoid. Everything will be okay . . . "As long as he actually gets here". Tine let the last bit slip out through his lips with frustration. 

Despite the clock not even having struck 3 pm yet, he was becoming rather impatient and grumpy about having to wait for the singer to show up. "You ask me out, and you're the one who ends up being late? The nerve of some people," Tine scoffed, letting his anxious energy out through verbal assaults on a defenseless Sarawat.

Just then his phone buzzed, sending a small wave of excitement into sea of emotion that was currently being overrun by nervousness and frustration. Tine quickly looked at his phone and saw the text was from Sarawat. It simply said: Here, I'll meet you by the river. Tine's heart jump. "He's here", he repeated to himself. "He's on his way". By then a smile had worked its way onto Tine's face, being a strong representation that his excitement for his date and his happiness to see Sarawat were beginning to overpower all his concerns and frustrations.

Tine was almost too caught up in his emotions that he didn't send a response, but after reading the text again in anticipation of seeing the musician's face, he remembered that he sound send a text back.

Tine: Okay, I'm already here so I'll see you soon!!

He finished the text and quickly hit send, without giving the message a read through, which he would soon discover was a grave mistake. Wait. No. I-I included two exclamation points . . . I shouldn't have. Why did I? Can I take it back? I can't. Oh my god no. He's going to know. He's going to know. He's going to be able to tell just how excited I am. Why didn't I read it through? Why? He was just being to curse himself for making such a rookie mistake as to let his true emotions shine through while talking to someone of interest, when a familiar laugh brought him out of his internal self criticism.