His Pain, My Pain

My Pain: Two.

Let's be honest I don't have control over anything, I'm practically powerless and I hate being powerless. I sat down as my parents rained insults on me. I couldn't say a word because I knew I'd get hit by my mother's hand when I do. Abdullahi sat down with his eyes judging me.

I hate this, I hate it when my parents show me to my face that they love my brother more, I get it they wanted only male children and I came out another sex but is that really my fault? Would you compare I who just got slapped while trying to resolve a fight and he who took Abbi's car without permission?

When my dad was done I got up and walked out without a word, and I promised myself I wouldn't let them have the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

...

Walking out of the house I notice a car parked on our compound and the excitement of the person driving it made me forget what had just happened.

He comes out of the car and walks over.
"You good?" he asks.

Sometimes Atiq really pisses me off, the way he looks at me like I am a child, I'm not! And the way he talks, it's like he isn't interested in talking at all, his smile seem forced and he's always emotionally clueless, there was a time he actually watched his classmate crying after falling down a pile of stairs, he didn't seem bothered about it but I was kind of happy other girls don't excite him.

"Just had my share for today's fight"
He smiles "So...You were part of that fight. I heard a friend saying his sister got slapped and he had to go settle things. You should have told me, I'm like a brother I would have settled it for you too"

Seeing his smile while talking to me, that I liked but being called his sister isn't what you'd want your crush to call you.
"You weren't even in school, I didn't see you".

"I probably was maybe just not in sight".
"You're always in the basketball court by 2pm but you weren't there that day".

He looks at me questionably and smiles, that's when I knew I fucked up.
"I didn't know anyone noticed" he says with a smirk.

"Yeah. I have a free class by that time so I'm always at the library".
"Ahh, that's great. Study hard".

He starts using his phone and smiling, I'm a girl ofcourse I'm thinking he's probably chatting with a girl.
"Anyway I wanted to come inform them that I'm leaving next week"

"Leaving?"
"Yeah, I got a scholarship".

"Is that possible? You're in ss2 and we're not done with the session"
"I wish it was my choice, I'll just come back another time. Don't think about secondary school boyfriends and study, they'll only waste your time and break your heart" he pats my shoulder and walks away.

Leaving? What am I supposed to do with my life? I run in heart broken not bothering to see him off.

::

I sat down just scribbling on my book, I didn't know what the teacher was saying, how could I? Atiq is officially leaving today and I'm dying inside.
"What are you doing?" Salim asks and I turn to look at him.

"What?" I ask.
"You're not paying attention, you always do".

"It's about something you don't need to know" I say back hissing.

"Yusuf! Danjuma! On your knees!" Mrs Wale calls us out by our last name.
"But ma—" she cuts Salim off.
"—Try to make and excuse you'll close your eyes and raise your hands".

We both kneel.
"Nonsense!" he collects the biro I'm staring at.
"Give it back"

He just hisses and turns his head away. Atiq is leaving me and Salim took the only thing I have that belongs to him. Long story short he met me on the way to the school shop, he asked where I was going and when I answered he gave me his pen and told me to get back so I won't miss anything going on in class.

::

I am always excited when Amina comes over. I always feel like I can breathe.
"So?" she asks raising her eyebrows.

"I really don't know Meenah, you know how Ammi and Abbi are. God help me! It's like they want to see me dead".
"Haba dai. It's just that they are blinded by this so called all male children shenanigans but don't bother yourself about it".

"So what am I supposed to be doing in this house?"
"You love cooking, you could start your own business. All this cake business, you've seen it. You can start"

"I'm not sure Ammi and Abbi would like that, I'm not sure I can keep doing it".
"You can stop it whenever you want to and they'll agree because they would think it will keep you busy".

I don't know what I would have done without Meenah and Salim, probably die, not that my parents would care.

::