Perhaps (Book 1) | ✔

ACT III - Scene 2

Accent Academy — the Steps of the Auditorium

I ran away from home so hard that I knew my legs would be sore later, but it didn't matter to me: I just wanted to get away. And, as I always did, I found myself back on campus. I didn't head towards the dance building this time, but to the auditorium building. I raced up the steps two at a time, almost slipping on the wet stone—and reached for the door.

It didn't budge.

It was locked.

I shook the handle and the door, reaching up with my other hand to pound on it. I even shouted for someone to open it and let me in, but no one came. I shouldn't have expected them to. The university was closed for the next five days. The professors and faculty were all at home with their families, not hanging around on campus.

Eventually, I collapsed to my knees and began to cry.

My hands clung to the door handle, continuing to shake it pointlessly every once in a while as fat tears ran down my face, as if it was a lifeline I needed to hold on to while the dam of emotions I had been fighting so hard for the last few weeks to keep at bay flooded me. How had everything become such a mess? How had my family ended up like this? How had I ended up like this?

Why had Dad started an affair with Eileen? Why had he started drinking so much? Why had he used my money to fuel both of these newfound addictions? Did he never think to himself how wrong it was? Did he never realize that he was stealing from his daughter? His Glory-Glory? Or did he realize and just not care because he was lost in that Botoxed bitch?

Why didn't Mom take me seriously when I first pointed out all the withdrawals to her? Why didn't she act on them before today? She had known that my money had been disappearing—why didn't she dig deeper for the reason why? Why had she waited? Had she just not cared enough to act? And how could she possibly be upset with me for breaking that whiskey bottle when she should have been the one to smash it against the floor? Didn't she want to break things too?

Was I not important to my mother anymore? Was I not important enough to my father?

Cold drops of rain poured from the sky, and I made no effort to move. Instead, I just clung to the door tighter. Like the dam that was my feelings, the rain soaked me and drowned me, too.

My lamenting about my family slowly turned into lamenting about the other parts of my life. How had I ended up like this? How had I gone from the girl I was at the beginning of the semester—happy and motivated—to this pathetic thing curled up in the rain outside of the only place she felt where she could hide? How could everything had just fallen apart the way it had? My family? My friendships?

Myself?

I was alone in all of this. I didn't have anyone to turn to for comfort or advice. And really, it was my own fault: because I had confided in no one about what was going on at home. How would I even begin to explain it?

I just wished I had a shoulder to cry on...

Sean and Layla had been officially dating since Halloween. All of their free time was spent together. I couldn't bring myself to intrude upon them. Sam and I shared passion in dance, but we really had nothing else in common. It would be so weird to lean on him for support. I didn't know Luke that well, so he was completely out of the question. Same with Blake. And then, there was Riley.

Riley still wasn't speaking to me. He had returned to school, I heard; but he wanted nothing to do with me. Sean had said that I needed to give Riley space, and maybe he would contact me when he was in a better place. But, right now, he felt too guilty about what he had done to be around me.