nostalgia after death

11:51

"So you're telling me that you knew me before but won't tell me how?" I asked after interrogating him earlier.

"Uh, yes?" He said bashfully, not stating a real answer.

"You know, I'm starting to think that being alone was better." I said while standing up from the cliff we sat on.

"Wait, I'll tell you once I'm ready." He said reassuringly, running his hands through his hair.

"Wait, aren't girls supposed to say that line?" I said, teasing him.

"So you're telling me that men can't say that they aren't ready just because of their gender?" His tone defensive as he looked at me ridiculously.

I laughed, enjoying his reaction. I offered my hand to help him stand.

He took my hand and we both looked at the view ahead of us. The sky was painted yellow with random strokes of orange and red, different birds passing by. All over us was nature. Down the cliff, were small houses with families eating their meals while some were still asleep.

Peter was one with nature, the greenery in his eyes showing serenity. As he stood there looking at me, I became aware of how I overlooked his beauty.

"You know my name, I think it's time for me to know yours." I started a conversation, staring at his green eyes.

His eyes has yellow specks on them, and it made him somewhat unearthly handsome.

"The name's Peter. Peter Velett." He said, a smile starting to form, showing off his dimples. I nodded, now knowing how to call him rather than always using 'he','him', and 'his'. Writing this story is kinda hard.

We were standing on a cliff and for once in a long time, I felt content. Wind was brushing over my face, sending my hair in different directions and it felt nice.

As if I wasn't dead right now, and cannot move on to my next life.

"Do you believe in reincarnation?" He asked absentmindedly.

I turned my gaze to him. He was looking at the sky, admiring the beauty of nature. His hair being wildly blown by the wind. I noticed that he has a beauty mark at the center of his right cheek. I can't help comparing him to my mom, who had a lot of beauty marks.

"Yes. I do. I want to look forward on what life has yet to offer me. Someday, I'll be reincarnated and possibly have a chance of having a proper death." I smiled at the thought.

I want to live again as a middle class citizen. Not insanely rich, but not too poor to not have a roof over their head. I can imagine myself having a complete family, one that was happy and sticks through thick and thin. I'll own a dog, and name him Nate. I'll work at Chipotle or maybe at Wendy's and I'll be happy. I'll die of old age with a loving husband.

He stared daggers on me, holding something I cannot decipher. It was like he was holding something back, wanting to say something.

I returned his gaze and asked,"What is it? Spit it out."

"How did you die?"

I was expecting to hear that. After all, I also wanted to ask him that. He just happened to have more guts than me.

"I overdosed."

It was a Friday night and rain was pouring. I think it was mourning, knowing that my impending death was near. Me and my friends decided to take some. We got it from an unknown seller that only Denie knew who. I just happen to eavesdrop and hear that the golden name was Lucas.

Not that it mattered, all I needed was to doze off to where my subconscious won't bother me. It's not like I was dependent on it, it just became my way out whenever I was too tired to face what life needed me to perform.

With my shaking fingers, I reached out for a pill and another and I didn't know that the moment I started dozing off, I would wake up at the hospital.

All I knew was that my pupils dilated, and then I was unresponsive.

It wasn't intentional, I just wanted to get a better high.

But did I?

____________________________                                   _________________

If you or a loved one has potentially overdosed on drugs, seek immediate medical attention by calling 911 to receive emergency help right away. You might also implement a few of the following procedures while waiting for medical personnel to arrive. However, be sure to avoid putting your own safety at risk since certain drugs can prompt violent or unpredictable behavior in the person taking them.

//Drugabuse.com//