love letters [completed]

january 20, 2018

dear hyunjin,

i thought about you again, well, more like last night. i can't stop thinking about you, and it's growing more and more. i wish i could tell you all these things in person.

august 6, 2015

you texted me, you said you were at my house already and to wear comfy clothes. and i did, i put on some gray sweatpants and a purple t-shirt and walked downstairs and out the door without a second thought.

and i saw you there, and you looked so ethereal, even if you were just wearing black sweats and an oversized hoodie, you someone pulled it off so well.

and i remember losing my breath, but i tired to stride over to you with bubbling confidence. and you smiled that cute little smile and opened the car door for me. i hoped in and you walked around to the driver side, sat down and started the car.

"where i we going?" i asked, the curiosity was biting at my heels.

"it's a secret" you responded with, and i kind of wanted to slap your arm, i hate surprises. i don't think i got the chance to tell you that.

i remember you asked me if i'd ever had a boyfriend, and i said a few. then i asked you the same question, and you said one. and that surprised me, since you were so attractive, even more so when you said you hadn't had your first kiss.

and fuck you for taking mine away. but i'd be lying if i said i don't think about if ffrom time to time, and miss that feeling ever so often.

i think i fell asleep in the car, cause next thing i know my side of the cars door is open and you're annoyingly poking me on the arm. i got out and you walked me over to a busy park.

there were couples everywhere and i could feel your excitement radiating off of you. you looked so happy, and so i was happy too.

you took out two small bundles from your canvas bag you were carrying and we sat down. you unwrapped the bundles to reveal a small but cute packed meal bento and you looked to proud of yourself.

you handed me a box and smiled widely, like a little kid showing their parents their art. i gladly took it, you gave me utensils and i opened the lid. steamed rose from the box and a heavenly aroma filled my senses.

you packed a lot of food, and me being me i just dug right in. i'm still eating well, i hope you are too. i cant remember the exact details of that day, it was really bright and sunny but not too hot out. the park was full of screaming and laughing kids, they were really cute.

and just like that we finished. i miss you, missed you? i don't know which it is anymore to be honest. i'm a bit of a mess, i hope you're doing better then me. the air pollution here is really bad, i'm sure seoul's is not the best either.

the drive home was something i'll never forget. it was getting dark but the sky was painted with shades of pinks? purpled, oranges, and blues all together. the clouds were a dusty pink, i remember that.

you played some music in the car and sang along to them and i'll always remember how angelic your voice was. it was like hearing heaven.

it was quiet, i don't remember talking about much. but it was comforting, i miss that. being around you was like an escape. you didn't make me feel awkward for not wanting to talk, i still appreciate that

~y/n