love letters [completed]

january 12, 2018

dear hyunjin,

wow, i've been busy lately. my life has been hectic as hell, so much has been happening. it's nice in china. the weather has been pleasant lately, any news to report in korea?

i saw your recent instagram post, and i truly realized how many fans you actually have..i wonder if these will ever get to you. will you get them if i send them to your old address? or would i just be sending these letters that i spent sleepless nights writing to a random person? i sure hope not.

anyway, august 5, 2015, i hope you can remember this date, maybe i bit more than the first day we met, our first date.

i remember waking up that day feeling like a great day was ahead of me, which is weird. cause as you know, i never felt that way. but i brushed it aside and got ready for a free laid back weekend.

i ate breakfast at around 8 am, something like that, if my memory serves me right. i dressed nicely, i wanted to make a good impression on you, for who knows what reason.

2pm inched closer and closer, and until it hit 1:10 i couldn't wait in my house any longer and i just left to go and browse the shops cause i was so anxious to see you again.

when you texted me that you were waiting outside the restaurant i almost ran full speed out the door of a small shop to you. i still don't know why i had such a strong compulsion in my body to run to you.

when i saw you standing there on your phone, you looked like something out of a movie. your outfit perfectly fit you and your personality, well, what i knew of it that is. your hair was styled just right and everything matched together.

i recall walking up to you very slowly, and tapping you on the shoulder. and you turned around and i was in awe at you. you looked so amazing that i nearly fainted on the spot, but instead i just tried to smile.

and you flashed that handsome smile of yours back and led me inside the restaurant. we sat down at a booth and started to scan the menu, and i remember taking peeks from above my menu to catch glances at you, and you never once caught me.

we ordered and we sparked conversation. i told you about my love for foreign languages, and how i wanted to be a teacher overseas. and i told you about how i used to be a singer and when i was little i wanted to become a celebrity and you laughed a little at that. and when i asked why,

you explained to me your interest in rapping, which surprised me a bit. and you also talked about your passion for dancing, and how you would dance all the time with friends.

and i admired that, and you seemed to be interested in me too, maybe that was just me though. you told me how you wanted to be an idol but and how hard you'd have to work. you told be you'd recently been scouted in the streets and how excited you were.

your eyes lit up like stars then, and i could practically feel your excitement radiating off of you. and i thought that was the coolest thing ever.

our food arrived, you immediately started to eat. and i liked that about you, how you didn't hold back, and how unapologetically yourself you were.

i remember you telling me how much you loved kpop idols and wanted to be just like one of them on the big stage surrounded by adoring fans screaming your name and their love for you.

i thought it was cute. and i remember telling you, "if it ever happens, you being an idol. i'll be your number 1 fan" and continued eating, i didn't want you to see my flushed face after saying something so bold.

and why did i even say that? i barely knew you and this was only a thank you for practically saving my life. i don't remember what else we talked about that day. i loved seeing you talk about the things you loved while wolfing down a whole steak, not a care about what you looked like.

it made you all that more attractive, if that was even possible. after we finished, i payed and i expected it to end there. with a simple good bye and never talking again. but you surprised me, "want to go to karaoke?" and i agreed.

don't worry, i don't agree to random outings with strangers anymore ;). but something about you urged me to say yes, so i did. and you dragged me about a mile away to your so called favorite karaoke bar.

and you rented a small room with the snap of your fingers and next thing i know we were stuck in a room with a big tv, flashing colored disco ball lights and some water. and you asked what song i'd like to play and i said i didn't care.

so you chose got7's 'you are', and told me to sing the vocals. at that point i hadn't sung in years, but for some reason i gave it a shot, all because you told me to. and we sung, song after song. and as the sun set and night broke and our voices were tired out, i remember singing one last song, i can't quite remember the song.

the song ended and i thought, again, this would be good bye. but hwang hyunjin you surprised me yet again. "i bet i can make you fall in love with me within this week" you said, with so much confidence.

and i sat there like an idiot, and with no response you stood up and walked to the door. i stood up too, and followed you out the door and out the karaoke place. and you turned to me again, "i'll say it again. i bet i can make you fall in love with me within this week"

i think i smirked, maybe i just stood there like a pawn. "and if i do?" i asked curiously, and you smiled smugly, "then we'll date, deal?"

i do remember slightly scoffing at the idea i would fall in love within a week. and that's when the thoughts of china came back to me. when i remembered i would be moving to shanghai on august 13th. and i checked my phone to check the date.

august 5. that's how i always remember, i checked the date twice that day. "deal" i said back and at the time, thinking it was close to impossible

"promise?" you asked smiling even wider, holding out your pinky

"promise" i responded, and interlocked my pinky finger with yours

but sometimes, promises are meant to be broken

regards, y/n