Colorless

The past and the present

It was a gloomy day. The rain finally started pouring for the upcoming winter season and all the bugs were being washed away. It was study period, and nobody was in the classroom, so I just sat as close to the window as I could to stare at the rain.

I hated the rain. Especially on days like this. It's wet, cold and smells like asphalt. Anyone who says they like rain is a liar; at least that's what I think.

"Ellie what are you drawing?" A fairly small Asian girl came up to Ellie. She had short dark hair with a colored patch near her bangs.

"Hey Gogo, I'm not really drawing much today" I replied. For a certain reason today wasn't my day, but I didn't want to worry her. She's a good friend of mine who's got her own problems.

"Ellie...don't be like that. Are you getting bullied again? I'll beat them up!" Gogo says, punching her left hand.

"Not as much as before in the beginning of college...it's just, people don't really think I'm an inventor since I can't build anything...I can only draw"

"Yeah well those people are huge nerds!"

"And you're one of them" I reply laughing.

She punches my arm softly, "yeah, yeah, ya dope...hey do you want to meet my other friends, I know you said you were nervous but--"

"No, I'm...not ready for new people not today"

"Ellie...stop being a dweeb"

"Hey! I just have really bad social anxiety okay! I'll do it when I'm ready" Gogos always wanted me to meet her other group of friends, but I get too nervous around other people in this college. I tell Gogo it's because I have social anxiety when actually I'm afraid they're going to bully me for my drawing designs. I don't like when people hate me.

"Yeah, well, let me know when you're ready I gotta get back to doing nerd stuff"

I laugh and give her a hug and she replies, "aww gross dweeb germs"

"Bye Gogo, text me when you can" I reply waving as she nods, walking out the study period door.

Gogo was the first friend I met at college. She saw some guys ripping out my sketch book and tearing them to shreds. She came up and threatened them to beat them up and apparently she had a reputation so the guys walked away. I was so happy I started crying right then. I hadn't met anyone as nice as her since. Although I do think if she's like that, she wouldn't have as bad of friends as I think.

I slouch in my desk and look out the window again. I think of my little sister. She used to love the rain, jumping all crazy in the puddles and getting wet. She would do cartwheels in the grass, but the grass would be really slippery so sometimes she would fall and we both would laugh and laugh.

"I miss her..." I sigh heavily.

"Miss who?" A deep voice says, coming close from the door.

I jump, insanely startled and turn around. It's a really tall skinny guy with dark hair and dark eyes. He was wearing a hat with the San Fransokyo logo on it.

My face turns beet red and I just sunk my face into my arms, "Nothing" I mumble. I didn't think anyone was in here.

"I know Gogo was just in here with her friend that we've never met, is that who you miss? Gogo?" He asks.

Ugh. Go away. Why is he pestering me like this it's not like he actually care-- "Are you one of Gogo's friends?" I blurt out. Shoot! I wasn't supposed to start conversation.

I feel like he realized I didn't want to start conversation in the beginning, but that I'm curious now because he has this smirky grin on his face. I roll my eyes.

"Yes I'm one of Gogo's friends. I'm Tadashi Hamada" he comes over to shake my hand. I turn away and look out the window. "Are you really gonna leave me hangin?"

I turn to look at him and he's smiling all big. What a nerd. I take his hand in a shake but look away and reply, "I'm Ellie Summers"

He pulls a chair out next to me. I turn my head and give him a "why are you suddenly pulling out a chair and being so close to me" look. He seems to not notice and looks only interested in my sketch book. I grab it really quickly.

"I want to see your sketches" he says, looking at me.

"No" I reply quickly hugging my sketch book so he can't grab it.

I look up at him and he's making a sad puppy dog face. How old is this nerd anyway. "No!" I say again. I don't want my sketches to get torn to shreds again.

"You know, Gogo told all of us about you" he says.

I turn my head really quickly thinking what the heck did Gogo say about me...

He does his stupid smirky smile again because he knows I'm interested in what he's saying. "She says you're lonely"

I do the biggest eye roll ever and look out the window again. This guy doesn't know anything about me. Ugh. Can he just...leave. I actually WANT to be alone right now.

"Listen Ellie, as you being one of Gogo's friends, I want to be one of your friends. I'm not gonna judge you because you draw; in fact, I think it's absolutely amazing you CAN draw because I can't to save the life of me. We've all wanted to meet you because of how much Gogo talks about you, all amazing things. And she rarely talks about anyone"

I look up at him with slightly teary eyes. I finally hand over my sketch book.

He does his big nerd smile again and looks through it. His eyes get wide, "Ellie, these are incredible" he says turning the pages.

"You're just saying that..."

"No I mean it! I want to draw like you, you make things look so easy and flowy. Like. How!?"

He did not just say that. He didn't. I start to cry. It was like a trigger. My little sister used to say that all the time. She wanted to get better at drawing like me. She always would draw and practice with me. Ugh. Why am I crying in front of Tadashi.

"Ellie!? What's wrong!?" Tadashi says.

"I'm fine" I say, tears running down my face. I try to smile but it only makes me more sad. I cover my face with my hands. I shouldn't be smiling when my little sister isn't here to smile with me.

Suddenly I feel a great warmth around me. Its Tadashi. I think he's trying to reassure me that everything will be okay. It was awkward for a few moments so I decide to hug him back and start crying again; he just has that effect on people I guess. Well for me anyway. As if you just want to stay in his arms forever and you believe him when he says everything's going to be alright.

That was the first time I met Tadashi Hamada.