DC One Shot And Imagines I

Harley Quinn- Rent (a)

"You know, sometimes, you can be a real jerk!" Harley leant forward until her upset grimace was only a few hairs away from your face. "I'm nice enough to offer you rent this month and this is how you repay me."

"Offer me rent? Harley you're my tenant you don't decide when you pay my rent."

"Well sometimes I just can't afford it." She crossed her arms over each other with a great huff and grumpily marched over to the other side of the room. "I'll pay you back, I promise. I really appreciates you letting me stay here. Please don't kick me out."

"This is my job Harley. My salary comes from people like you, just like your salary comes from... How do you actually get your money?"

"I'm really venturing into bounty hunting at the moment, the benefits aren't great, and lord knows I could really do with some health insurance." She threw herself onto the sofa, which since Harley renting out the apartment had become a lot more stained; you were just happy it was still in one piece. "But it does mean I get to merge my job with my hobby, and let me tell you, I'm not into collecting model trains."

"Great. You don't pay rent and now I know where the bloodstains in the hallway have come from."

"Oh no, that's not me. I think that's little Ms. Green from over the way. She seems pretty fierce for a ninety-two-year-old." She grabbed a warm can from the table which her muddy boots lay on and didn't even flinch when the bubbly froth dribbled down the can and onto the floor.

"I'm keeping a tab, and you owe me three thousand dollars, plus a new sofa and something to clean the carpet. It was cream when you moved in, brand new too."

"I'm sorry. It's just since Mr J and I had our little split the money just isn't coming in as it used to. If you know somebody who needs whacking though you just give me a call. I'll give 'em a discount, friend rates and all." She finished the can in one long swig and tossed the crunched can behind her.

"I don't know anybody who needs somebody killed. I'll call you to hand yourself in if you don't pay your rent though."

"Wait." She hopped to her feet. "Ooh ooh. How about... hear me out here. I take out..." She continued with a cartoonish wink "somebody whose been giving you some trouble and we can knock say two nine ninety-nine off my bill. I think I have a dollar around her somewhere."

"I don't want anybody killed. I'll give you a few months to get your shit together, after that you can start paying rent until we're square."

"Thank you sugar!" Harley blew a loud kiss as you left her apartment. "Remember though, if you need someone offing, Harley and Co is your best bet... THE CO IS ME TOO."

~*~

Written by Aaron.