c h a n g e -o f- h e a r t

• c h a p t e r f o u r t e e n •

(A mini chapter. The next one will be much longer, I promise)

I touch my lips where, just hours ago, Matty had been kissing them gently and yet as if his life depended upon it. I can't seem to stop smiling as I roll over in the bed I share with Rose, at one of the boy's guest houses. Matty is upstairs somewhere, probably asleep. I'm sure he would have let me sleep in the same bed as him, but after he had pulled away earlier and confessed that he wouldn't be able to stop if they kept kissing, I suppose it's best if we take the space between us.
And yet here I am, tossing and turning.
As if on cue, right beside me, my phone lights up and I roll over and grab it when I see Matty's name on the screen.
Matty: you awake?
Me: yeah
Matty: can't sleep?
Me: something like that? You?
Matty: something like that.
Cheeky little...
Matty: fancy coming up here with me?
Me:...to your room?
Matty:...yeah?
I pause for a moment. Do I want to?
Well that's not the real question. Of course I want to, but should I? Would going up there mean he would expect something more from me and am I ready for that? I frown as I try to sift through my thoughts, but the vibrating of my phone pulls me out of my thoughts.
Matty: second door on the right at the top of the stairs
I smile to myself, my decision has been made for me, it would seem.
I creep up slowly, trying to tiptoe around the bodies sleeping on the floor or draped across various pieces of furniture as I make my way to the stairs. Before I even have to look, I hear a door open. I look over to see Matty, standing there in all of his glory, running a hand sleepily through his dark, curly hair, "hello, love," he says, his voice thick with sleep.
Suddenly I find myself very shy, "hi," I say back.
Matty regards me for a moment before grinning and stepping aside, allowing me into the room, "it's a little messy, sorry."
I shrug, not really caring, as he leads me to the ginormous bed, a bed too big for one person, pushed up against the far wall. "c'mere," he holds his arms out to me and I go to them, willingly. He pulls me down next to him, having me face him. He doesn't say anything at first, he just looks at me a little and runs his fingers through the ends of my hair. He looks down at our hands as he intertwines mine with his and then looks up, meeting my eyes again. He pulls me a little closer to him, his hands around my hips, before wrapping his arms around me. I lean forward and press my head against his bare chest, closing my eyes and breathing in the warmth he provides. The room is soft and comfortable. His arms around me make me feel the safest I've felt in a long time. Matty leans down and the presses a kiss to the top of my head and I smile, even though I know he probably can't see it. We don't even need to say anything to one another. I wait for him to make any moves, wondering if he expect something from me now that I've coming up. After a moment, Matty whispers in my ear, "turn around, I want to spoon you."
I realize, with huge relief, that he isn't expecting anything other than to actually sleep next to one another. I roll over onto my side and I feel him wrap his arms around me, pulling my back to his chest tightly. He throws a leg up over mine, our legs now intertwined like our hands are. He presses soft kisses against my shoulders and on the back of my neck, moving the hair out of the way. It sends goosebumps up my arms and I shiver. Matty only holds me tighter, but continues to press soft kisses against my skin. I close my eyes and let out a content sigh as I allow myself to drift off. Before I fully drift away I hear him whisper, probably believing me to be asleep, he whispers, "I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful, yet so unaware of it," he says the words to himself mostly, but I recognize them as one of the album titles. I feel him smile against the back of my neck. "It's true," he whispers, "you are so beautiful , even when you sleep." Then presses one last kiss against my skin before tightening his arms around me and nestling his head against my shoulder. And then, the two of us, all wrapped up in one another, legs, fingers, bodies, intertwined and tangled up, fall asleep, peacefully together.