Is A High School Story

Chapter 12

Authors Note: Another sad chapter here as well. :( I was going to put all of the sadness in the last one but didn't want it to be too long or anything. A new chapter will also help explain things more and stuff like that. 

                                                                  Word Count: 1877

Richard's POV

I am NOT depressed. I can't be depressed. There's no way. Yet, Matt just stormed out saying to stop being depressed. And the way he said things, did we..no. We couldn't have. It was just a fight. A stupid fight. Couples fight all the time...I've got nothing to worry about. I just need to take a deep breath and relax. Calm down and think about the situation. I went back to my bed and laid down and closed my eyes, and thought about everything that just happened. Damn it. It really is my fault this happened. Because of stupid me losing my temper. Mattie...forgive me.

                                                    The next morning on the walk to school....

I went to the store and bought Matt some chocolates and flowers. Hopefully this will be enough for him to forgive me. I got to school late but it worked out in my favor. No one was in the halls to see me with the stuff. I put it by Mattie's locker and taped it there so no one would steal it. Well, I at least hope no one will steal it. Then again, this is high school. I ended up staying around Matt's locker the entirety of first period more or less. The people trickled in and I spotted Matt from a mile away. He didn't seem to see me, but he didn't really have any expression on his face. No smile, no frown, nothing. Just kinda of like a blank canvas. When he did see me, his face didn't change. Not a good sign. But at least he didn't have a choice but to come to me, since I was at his locker. :D

"Hey Mattie." I didn't hug or kiss him or anything since it was still too early for that. I just wanted him to forgive me, and then we'd build off from there.

"Hello." His response, his voice. It was surprisingly cold. I mean I knew he wouldn't be in his happiest voice, but I didn't really expect this..

"Look, I'm really really really sorry for how I was yesterday. I was in a mad mood as you saw. I didn't mean to yell, and lash out at you. You didn't deserve it. You were doing your best to help me. I also bought you some chocos and flowers."

Matt looked at the stuff I got, then back at me. He looked partly shocked, but seemed to be thinking about something. Could it be possible that he won't...

"Richard...look." He sighed. A few people gathered around watching. Including my now fake friends. This is not good.

"I get what your saying, and I understand what happened, but I think it's best we take this break from each other. I know it will hurt you and me, hell I'm hurting right now saying this. But you need time to yourself. You need to realize that just because something bad in your life happens doesn't mean it's your fault. You have to realize that on your own. You still think the fire was your fault, right?"

I slowly nodded. It was my fault though...what is he saying...

"Okay, the rumor around the school and everyone bothering and bullying you for it. Do you also think that that is your fault?"

I nodded again. It was my fault. If i never started the fire, then no one would of been able to make a rumor in the first place. I'm so careless..

"That's the problem. Right there. The first part yes, that was your fault I'll admit it, but the second part is not. You know it's not too, but for some reason you think it's easier to blame yourself. I don't get it. Until you come to terms with yourself and realize it's not your fault, it's best we distance ourselves from each other. I want to help you, but you have to help yourself first."