Tribulation»Muke AU

•10•

(Michael's POV)

It's been three days since I kissed Luke and I haven't seen him since.
I'm so fucking stupid. I can't let this happen again. I can't fall in love with anyone, not after what happened last time. I can't do this.
"Fuck!" I yell as I tear at my hair and pace around the room.
Luke hasn't left my head for three days straight, I think it's going to drive me insane. I want to stop thinking, I want to forget.
So that's what I'm going to do, I'm going to drink and drink until I can't remember my name. I grab my keys and slam the door on my way out.
I drive to the bar where I'm probably very well recognized, considering I'm here almost every weekend. The bartender places four shots in front of me. My usual. I know I'm going to regret this because I have work tomorrow, but right know I couldn't care less. I down the four shots quickly. It burns my throat but it's better than feeling nothing.
~
I don't remember how many shots I've taken but I can still picture Luke's face and feel his lips, so I know it's not enough.
~
I'm not sure what I'm drinking now, but I know it's making my brain fuzzy so I like it. I can still feel Luke in my head, I swear I'm going crazy. I can't remember where I am or what my plan was but I still remember his face.
Suddenly the crowd of dancing, sweating bodies that once gave me comfort is now suffocating me. I push and shove people out of my way, not caring about my rudeness. A girl blocks my way. She's wearing too much makeup, has too thin eyebrows, and is wearing a very tight, very short, purple dress.
"Hello." She says, suddenly standing too close to me. I smile at her. Why not have a little fun while I know I wont remember it? But my smile fades as Luke's face pops back into my head. The girl grinds against my body but I push her away. She makes a bitchy face and moves on to her next victim.
Finally, I reach the doors of the bar and push them open. Before I know it, I'm staggering down the street trying hard not to fall over or pass out. I don't know where I'm going but somewhere deep in my brain I know this is the right way. I had to stop, at one point, to throw up on the side of the road for a minute. Instead of continuing on my journey to god knows where, I sit on the curb and take a swig of the bottle in my hand. A car drives by, and it makes me think. What if I were to die right now? What if I were to just jump in front of that car and let it suck the life from me? How would other's lives be affected? How would Luke's be affected? He probably couldn't care less.
Deep thoughts like these are just telling me that I'm not drunk enough.
A down the rest of the contents from the bottle and toss it to the side.
At some point, while I'm walking, my vision gets spotty and I'm a little worried I might pass out but I couldn't care less at the moment. Finally, after lots of stumbling and falling, I find myself walking up the stairs of my apartment building. Instead of going into my own apartment though, I go to Luke's. With a very unclear and clouded mind, I knock loudly on Luke's door. A few moments later Luke opens it, looking as if he just woke up but he's still in his regular clothes.
"Michael? It's like 2:00 in the morning, what are you doing here?" Luke asks. Fuck, his voice sounds amazing when he's sleepy.
"I hav-ve a bone to pick with you." I slur, leaning on the door frame. Luke raises his eyebrows.
"Oh?"
"Y-yeah. The thing is.. I can't get you out of my head." I jab a finger into the side of my head.
"Michael, are you drunk?"
"Maybe. I don't know." I say, hiccuping halfway through my sentence.
"Do want to come in and talk?" Luke asks carefully. I nod. Walking to the couch was an obstacle, I tripped on nothing almost every step I took. Before Luke sits on the couch I put my hands on his shoulders.
"Can you please leave my head? Even when I'm completely shitfaced you're still there." Luke doesn't say anything, just stares at me and bites him lip.
"Dammit don't do that, or else I'll kiss you again." I say, leaning forward. Luke just raises is eyebrows but doesn't release his lip. Fuck.
I'm so close to his face, our lips are only centimetres apart, but he pushes me back.
"Michael you're drunk." He says, looking down at his feet. I step away from him a little, stumbling as I do so.
"Can you see what you are doing to me? I like you. A lot. And it scares me and I don't want to like you but, hell, I think I'm falling in love. That's whats wrong with me you know, I get attached too easily then people get freaked out and leave." I grip my hair with both hands, backing away from Luke.
"Michael, I want you to know that I like you too but I know you won't remember this. You won't even remember you told me." Luke gives me a sad smile.
"I want to forget. Because you deserve so much more than me." Luke just stands there, his mouth hanging open as if he's speechless.
"Just get out of my fucking head!" I say loudly. I back up until I hit the door then I leave, stumbling two feet down the hall to my apartment door. I didn't realize I was crying until I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror as I walked by. I make my way into my bedroom, stripping off my pants as I climb into bed. I see darkness cloud my eyes and I welcome it, enjoying the thought of my mind being Luke-free for a little while.

A/N hey guys, sorry for not updating on Friday like I said I would, but I was sick. I've had half of this chapter written for like a week but I was having mad writers block -.-
So yeah I don't really like this chapter but oh well
Also I just want to point out that I totally forgot to say when Luke got his stitches out but whatever let's just say it was during the three days they weren't talking, okie dokie?
Please leave comments, they literally make my day ☺ (they also encourage me a lot js)
Okie dokie
Toodles